Dear Katherine ,
This is me, your younger self at 18. I don't have any idea what difficult situation you're in but believe me, I am in the same situation and I made it. I survived. Firstly because we're the same person. Secondly, because we aren't weak.
Tiniklop ko na ang notebook ko at niligpit. They call it diary, I call it " the Other Me ". It has a small belt that serves as lock at ako lang ang nakakabukas nito.
" Eeew, nagsusulat ka ng diary? Napaka old - style ."
I turned my head and saw Kim's ally number 2 na may makapal na lipstick at eyeshadow pero walang foundation.
Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay.
" Hindi kita pinakialaman kahit gothic style yang mukha mo," I said and rolled my eyes before leaving.
Writing is my soul's silent scream. If you have problems with that, you'd better punch yourself before I do.
" Hush my loves now don't you lie....
Karma's got a way of making things right.... "
Maraming beses na tumunog ang phone ko, an indication that I have tons of messages received. Judging from the ringtone I recently set, messages are sent on my Code Game number.
Ano na naman kaya ang isyu ng Code Game this time?
Pumasok ako sa powder room at doon na binasa ang mga messages ko. Things related to Code Game must not be shown in public. That's one of the Code Game norms.
[ Code Game starts 13 days from now. Be prepared ]
/ Medusa /
[ Code Game starts 13 days from now. Be prepared ]
From: Devion.
Code Game starts 13 days from now. Be prepared.
From: Commandment.
My insides shiver at the thought. I anticipated this moment since the first time I encounter Code Game. Pero ngayong nagsimula na ang Code Game countdown, nakaramdam ako ng kakaiba. It may be fear or excitement, I could not determine which is which. But part of me, my intuition I think, keeps whispering me to back out.
Paano?
Some days, I can't wait to start playing. Some days, I wish the time would stop running and Code Game will never happen.
" Hush my loves now don't you lie.... "
[ I'm behind you. Count 1 - 50 before turning your head ]
From : Eros
Requirements ang pagiging masunurin ng mga players kaya nagbilang din ako.
The moment I turn my head, there's no trace of Eros, except of course, for the white box and white rose on the ground.
Hindi ko na binasa ang message niya na nakadikit sa white rose. I opened the box first.
" Chocolates?!! "
I licked my lips.
Ang daming chocolates! I'm not into sweets pero namamangha ako sa dami.
Pa'no ko ba uubusin 'to?!
Tiningnan ko ang rose at binasa ang mensahe niya saken.
" Code Game starts 13 days from now. Be prepared "
" Hush my love now don't you lie..... ."
[ There's something I needed to tell you ]
From: Damon.
Reply : Ano?
[ Code Game starts 13 days from now. Be prepared. ]
Reply : SA TINGIN MO DI KO ALAM?!!!
[ That's not what I mean ]
Reply: ANOOOO?!!!
Natagalan ang reply niya kaya naiinip ako. Tssk.
[ Let's have our cruise ship date before Code Game starts ]
My mood shifts from negative 10 to positive 100.
Did he really buy a cruise ship? For me?
I can't stop myself from smiling. Ewan ko sa lalaking 'to.
Reply: kailan? * smiley face *
[ The date is all yours ]
[ May MPD ka ba o sadyang marupok ka lang talaga? ]
Reply: May klase pa ako. At ano yang MPD - MPD na pinagsasabi mo?
[ Kanina lang galit na galit ka. Ngayon naman para kang timang kakangiti dyan]
How did he know that I'm smiling? Palinga- linga ako sa paligid.
[ Timingin ka sa taas ]
Just as expected, nasa itaas sya ng puno.
" Come here," utos niya saken na nginitian ko lang.
" I'm sorry Damon. I'm not a monkey."
Tumango-tango lang siya.
" If being a monkey means having the ability to climb trees, I admit I am. Ikaw? bakit ayaw mong umakyat? Hippotatamus ka ba? "
Hippo?!
" Sabihin na lang nating pinagbigyan kita," I said and climb.
Pagkaupo ko sa malaking sanga ay tiningnan ko ang direksyon na tiningnan niya.
I was stunned at the scenery before me. Not because it's beautiful but because it's horrific.
" That's the world outside Zse Academy, Katherine," aniya.
I spotted a boy running after stealing from someone's pocket.
For some reason, I felt my heart being squezzed.
"Children who are supposed to be studying are striving to survive. We have thousands of schools but they are not only aiming to teach. They are aiming to earn," dagdag niya.
" Pero kailangan rin naman kasi ang pera Damon. Money is needed to improve the quality of education. Schools would not develop if they give everything for free. That's a basic knowledge."
" You're right. That quality education na mayayaman lang ang nakinabang. They need money to nurture rich people and leave the poor behind. You could hate me but I'm blaming school for discrimination and oppression."
" You should blame the oppressors Damon. School could not teach goodness to people with evil intent. They only teach theories, the deeds are for us to carry out."
" They should stop teaching then. Their responsibility is to teach, failure to do their duty, is failure of their existence."
" Napaka .. grrrr. Ang dami ng studyante Damon! Teachers are also humans! "
" Students are not giving money for free. They are paying for the betterment of themselves and you're telling me teachers are humans?! That would never be enough for an excuse! "
" No! "
" Yes Katherine! That's the reason why only the wealthy have the priviledge to study. Base on your argument, only those who could pay for a quality education deserves school. Note that. Improved quality of education. Tapos teachers are humans?! Are you on your right thinking?"
" Right thinking my foot! analytical and critical thinking are responsibilities of the left side of the brain. At Damon, don't be so childish. School and education is necessary but we should not depend on it. We should be responsible on our own ."
" Why are they necessary if we can't depend on them?"
" Damon!"
" Why do they claim that they're important if we can't depend on them. Why do they exploit money if we can't depend on them? Why do they neglect the poor if they could only teach theories? How much does per theory cost actually?"
"Come on Damon! There are lots of factors why people suffers and they remain poor! School is not the only one to blame."
" NOT THE ONLY ONE TO BLAME. Noted Miss Katherine Pierce. I'll take that as an indication that you agree with me."
" I mean. Getting education is a long process. You can't get it if you're doing nothing. Don't wish to experience the easy road rich people are having because we have different status. They did not acquire that wealth by doing nothing. They acquire it in a more difficult way you could never imagine!"
"Don't misunderstood me. I'm not against the rich! I'm against the educational system!"
" As I said, we are responsible for our actions. Instead of seeing how unfair things are, why don't they strive to be in the same place as the rich so they could understand and receive the same privile__."
" So you're saying they have to be rich for them to deserve education."
"No! I mean__."
" You just debunk your statement."
Grrrr!
" Objection!__"
" Overruled! You failed to defend your school. The educational system is guilty against charges."
Ganito kami lagi kapag nag-uusap sa Players Academy. Ang hilig niya makipagdebate saken.
" Bahala ka dyan! Wag mo akong kausapin!"
He smiled and sighed afterwards.
It's as if there's a story behind his strong argument. Did I misunderstood it all along?
" I used to think like you Nikka. I used to understand them because they fed us this kind of knowledge. One day, I just realized they took advantage of us."
Kung may emosyon mang namayani sa mga mata ni Damon, iyon ay kalungkutan at sakit.
He is a book with chapters written in codes. I want to read him but he's just too difficult to understand.
Nabaling ang tingin ko sa tanawing makikita mula sa itaas ng puno. He did not mean to show me how the poor people lived. He did not mean to argue who's to blame in their situation. He , in his way, give me a hint and clue in deciphering his coded life.
" We are revolving in a business world Katherine. We are neither businessmen nor customers. We are but mere products wrapped in fancy plastics to be sold ."
He smiled sadly as his eyes fixated on me.
" I rest my case," he softly said.
Namayani sa amin ang katahimikan ng ilang minuto. Nakakabingi na so I decided to break it.
" Kain tayo ng mangga. Yung may hipon," I demanded.
"Naglilihi ka ba?"
" Hindi ako buntis. At tumigil ka sa lihi - lihi mo dyan. That's not even explained and supported by science."
" Some things needs no explanation nor support. Some truths are experienced and felt."
"Really? "
Then ba't nya ako hiningian ng research at theories tungkol sa existence ng multo?
" Mmm. Gaya ng ghost na kinatatakutan mo ."
"Hahaha. Sinali mo pa talaga," I said.
It happened often. Yung parang alam niya ang nasa isip ko. Parang telepathy at some sort.
Natawa siya ng mahina at napatingin saken ng seryoso.
" At gaya ng salitang I love you ," he said, making me stared at him, speechless.
__________________________________
I am dressed as a player. Hindi sana pwede kaso dahil sa usapan namin ni Zhieyeke, we are given exemption to be players even if we're supposed to rest.
Gaya ng ilang attempt namin ni Gusion, we failed in tracing His daughter.
The eight PM coldness hugged me. I am in the dark alley when a man suddenly jumpped down from the rooftop.
It took me seconds to know him.
Si Sin na naman?!
Napahawak na naman siya sa may gilid niya. He's groaning in pain at napaluhod siya sa lupa habang hawak- hawak ang tagiliran niya.
Ano na naman ang nangyari sa lalaking 'to?
Buti na lang at naisuot ko ang voice changer na ibinigay ni Eros nung nakaraan.
" Excuse me. Can I__." natigil ako sa pagsasalita nang itinutok niya ang baril saken.
" Don't move. Don't look at my eyes if you still want to live."
Nag-iwas ako ng tingin.
" You're dying! I could help___."
Namilipit sya sa sakit at alam ko dahil nakikita ko siya sa peripheral vission ko.
Lumapit ako sa kanya.
" Kailangan mong magam___."
BANG!
He shoot just about 1 inch above my head.
" The next bullet will be in your forehead. Try touching me and I'll take you to hell with me ."
He coughed blood which made me panic even more.
" Please let me __."
" That mask belongs to Code Game Players. Ah! I heard there's a girl in White Clan."
He coughed blood again. I wanted to take him home but he seemed so serious of not letting me touch him.
It occurred to me then. He did not know me as Nikka. It would be troublesome to approach him.
" Pretend that you don't see me," he said.
Nakatutok saken ang baril niya habang tumakbo siya palayo. Agad ko siyang sinundan at hinanap. Pero hindi ko siya naabutan.
Shit!
Sinong baliw ba kasi ang ayaw magpaligtas? Siya lang naman eh! Walang ibang Sin sa mundo!
Nagbihis ako sa Platform 5 at umuwi sa bahay na puno ng pag-aalala.
" Kath! Gabi na ah!" puna ni papa na umiinom ng kape sa sala.
Tumakbo ako at niyakap siya.
" May problema ba?"
I sighed.
" Wala naman pa. Akyat na ako sa kwarto."
Why did I worry over him anyway? Nakakainis talaga.
Maghuhubad na sana ako ng damit nang may kamay ang tumakip sa bibig ko.
" Don't scream. It's me."
It's Sin. Naghalo ang saya, galit at pag-aalala ko sa kanya.
When he let me go, I instantly kicked his groin.
"Aaaaggghhhh," he groaned.
" Kung saan - saan ka na lang sumusulpot! "
" Grabe ka saken."
" Kasalanan mo eh! "
" Pasalamat ka babae ka."
Ano naman kung babae ako? Kanina lang mukhang papatayin niya naman talaga ako.
" Tumayo ka," I said.
Tumayo naman agad siya.
" Hubarin mo upper shirt mo."
A playful smile formed in his lips.
" Ang bilis naman ata. Wala man lang foreplay?" aniya sabay lip bite.
Shiiit!
I rolled my eyes, walk a step closer to him and ripped his clothes.
His shocked expression, the movement of his adams apple when he gulped and his playful smirk made him even hotter. I pushed him on my bed and leave him there as I checked my drawers for the first aid kit.
Nakatitig lang siya saken habang tinanggal ko ang bala sa tagiliran niya gamit ang gunting. Kung mabaril 'to sa ulo di na ako magugulat talaga. I cleaned the wound and covered it afterwards.
Natigil ako nang mapadako ang tingin ko sa matigas niyang abs. I found myself touching it selflessly. It looks yummy. He's height and handsome face made it look even yummier. And the fact that it belongs to him made it look the yummiest. Wait! Hindi ko pa nakita yung kay Commandment! Pa'no kaya yung kay Damo__ah! crash that skinny jerk!
Ang payat nun! Napangiti na lang ako.
" Ah! " napasigaw ako nang tinampal ni Sin ang labi ko. Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin.
" Why are you smiling like that? Are you thinking of someone else?"
" Ano bang pake mo? "
I was about to stand up when his strong arms grasp my wrist and pulled me on top of him.
Good thing my reflexes were quick. I was able to prevent my body from hitting his wound.
" Tingnan mo ang mga mata ko Katherine. Ano ang nakikita mo? "
Napakabobong tanong.
" Sarili ko, tanga! "
" Of course. A proof that my sight are yours," he said in almost a whisper.
" And?"
" You should only see me too. Only. Me."
I faked a smiled.
" Lame. Other girls could look at you. Ibig sabihin ba, pagmamay-ari na rin nila ang paningin mo?"
He smiled slightly and shook his head.
" That would never happen," he said.
Nagflashback bigla ang mga sinabi niya saken.
" Don't move. Don't look at my eyes if you still want to live."
" The next bullet will be in your forehead. Try touching me and I'll take you to hell ."
Napatingin ako sa mga labi niya. I wondered how it taste. Napapikit na lang ako. Why am I thinking weird?
We were both staring at each other for only time knows how long.
" Hush my loves now don't you lie..."
I broke the eye contact and check my phone.
[ Freya St., Star Condominium, 5th floor , door 2. , 0CSZGSDN ]
From: Commandment
Tumayo ako at kinuha ang posas sa drawer.
" What are you__."
" I'm going somewhere. At dahil lagi kang naghahanap ng sakit sa katawan, ikukulong kita dito. Dahan- dahan ka sa pagkilos dahil baka mabinat ka."
He sighed and nod at me.
" Take care and come back to me asap, okay? " pahabol niyang wika na hindi ko na pinansin.
__________________________________
Nikka drove her Bullets 2000 like her life depended on it. She did not even parked it properly and run off to the elevator.
She don't know what's going on. Hindi siya mapakali hangga't hindi niya masigurong ligtas si Commandment.
She prayed silently, over and over again that he's safe.
Hindi na sya kumatok. Nagmamadaling tinatype na niya ang passcode.
0CSZGSDN
When the door opened, he stormed inside the room.
" Commandment? " she called.
" Commandment? "
Walang sumagot pero bumukas ang pintuan ng isang room at lumabas si Commandment. Sandali silang magkatitigan.
Puno ng pawis ang mukha nito at halata sa mukha nito ang iniindang sakit. Her heart was pierced with unfamiliar pain.
Malalaking mga hakbang ang ginawa ni Commandment papunta sa kanya.
She didn't expect what happened next.
He hugged her, tightly.
Naistatwa siya ng ilang segundo.
" Thank you for coming to me ," pabulong nitong wika.
Dahan-dahan niyang itinaas ang kamay at niyakap rin ito ng mahigpit.
" Okay ka lang ba?" mahina niyang tanong dito.
Mas humigpit pa ang pagyakap ni Commandment sa kanya.
" I'm fine now that you're here."
Hinimas-himas niya ang likod nito.
Of course she would be here.
He is Nikka's priority after all.