3 days later...
Monday, January 28th
7:15 AM
Raelyn Johnson-Brooks:
"Kayla please don't get your food on your uniform." I said as i got ready to take the kids to school and go to work.
"Sorry." She said in her little voice.
"What I tell you bout saying sorry for everything?" Kam said as he walked in the kitchen and gave us all a kiss.
"Oh yeah. Sorry daddy—I mean—never mind." Kayla said as she ate her bagel and bacon.
~Kayla Brooks *4 y/o*
"You alright baby?" Kam asked me as he pulled me by waist into a hug.
I wrapped my arms around his waist. He made me feel so at ease.
"I'm trying to be, babe." I said as I rested my head on his chest. "Maybe it's God's way of telling me something. But I won't question Him."
He pulled my face in for a kiss.
"You so strong. Love you."
"Love you more." I said before walking off to get Kj and Kayla in the car.
"Bye daddy" The kids said in unison.
"See y'all later. Have a good day at school." Kam said.
I played the radio on the way to school today, when typically I wouldn't. I would just talk to the kids. But today I didn't really feel like talking. I was so sad all weekend, but I realized I couldn't sit around and keep blaming myself. But, I was still grieving.
When I went to the doctor on Kam's birthday to check on the baby, he or she didn't have a heartbeat.
Kam told the kids because I didn't have the strength to. He told them not to keep asking me about it, which I GENUINELY appreciate.
Kam has been so supportive since this happened, he doesn't even understand how thankful I am for him.
I scrolled on Instagram as I waited in the car line to drop the kids off at their school, and noticed that Kyla posted a picture with Stretch standing behind her, holding her stomach.
Not what I wanna see right now AT ALL.
Kyla still followed me, so I still followed her, but we never talked since she went to college. But when I seen that picture, I quickly unfollowed and blocked her. Knowing how she be moving now, I can't still follow her ass.
I finally got the top of the line and let the kids out the car.
"Bye mommy!" Kayla said as she put her bookbag on her back and got out the car.
"Bye ma" Kj said as he leaned to the front seat to give me a kiss.
He's such a mama's boy. Made my heart warm.
"Bye babies." I lightly smiled.
————————
At Work...
Children's Hospital of Atlanta
8:47 AM
"Hey Rae! I didn't even see you come in this morning girl!" My coworker, Janice, said to me.
Whaaaaat do you wanttttt I don't feel like being BOTHERED!!!
"Hey, Janice. Yeah I just got in." I said, turning back around to my computer.
"Alright. I'll leave you alone. I know it's Monday." She chuckled.
Janice was in her late 40s. She was always nice to me, and we had some of the best talks. But I'm not in the mood today. I feel bad if I gave off a vibe that made her feel some type of way.
"No you're fine-" I said before turning around, but she was already gone.
Damn...
4 hours later...
I was sitting at the front desk when I heard a very familiar voice.
"Hey Raelyn.." Kyla said as she stood in front of the desk.
Bitch WHY are you in Atlanta?? Why you and your nigga always popping up on somebody?
What a fucking coincidence that I JUST unfollowed and blocked her this morning. Something is up.
"May I help you?" I said.
It made me sad to see her baby bump, RIGHT in my face.
"Yeah actually you can." She said getting smart. "Actually, I wanted to compliment your kids—who I sadly don't know like that even though they my cousins too." She chuckled.
She's testing me.
"I'm on lunch break right now so if there's nothing I can help you with you might wanna leave." I said before grabbing my keys to go something to eat and walking right past her.
She followed me out to my car.
"I wanted to tell Paris I was sorry. We don't gotta be cool again but I just wanted to apologize." She said.
"Why are you fucking following me? If you cared that much, you would've told Paris' dad—who lives in L.A., where YOU also live, with your boyfriend STRETCH. Not come all the way to Atlanta to tell me to tell her that. Fuck is wrong with you?"
"Why you acting like I did something to you?" She said. "Don't get mad at me cause of your lil situation." She pointed to my stomach.
HUH?
FUCK SHE SAY?
When I tell you I smacked the FUCK out of this girl.
"Bitch?" I said before slapping her again. "What the fuck you say?"
I took my earrings off.
"What the fuck???" She said, shocked, as she held her face. "You gone really fight a pregnant woman?"
She started backing up.
"Bitch shut up! You use that as your excuse now to get out of shit! You're not a fucking woman! You act like a little ass teenage GIRL! I promise if that fetus wasn't in your mother fucking womb I would've hurt you by now." I said before walking off.
But, I turned back around.
*SLAP*
"And bitch say another fucking thing about ANY of my kids—DEAD OR ALIVE—ima fuck yo scrawny ass up. Don't fucking test me hoe." I said, walking away again.
I waited for her to hit me back, but she didn't. PUSSY.
I've had enough.
When I got in my car, I cried...and cried...and cried.
I went to American Deli, ate in my car, and went back into work with a smile on face.
I'm so tired.