Chapter 1: The First Page

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Friends....... They come an they go, it's true, friends..... End, they love you and they blame you, you need them because without them your a social outcast, you don't want them because they don't always agree with what you say or how you feel, but the point is when you lose a friend you feel like you can't live without them, When I lose a friend I feel like everything is my fault.... Dose anyone else ever feel like that? I mess up everything.... Friendships... The trust... the love.... It's all gonna crash an burn, i can't make it out of this torture sell, ( lack of better words) I can't run away because it runs right behind me, I can't hid because it knows all of my hiding places, I am a prisoner in my own head..... My mind wants to kill me..... And it dose but it doesn't stop, it just repeats itself and repeats itself, I just wanna grab a chair and rope sometimes,but.. I'm not a foolish girl, but sometimes it seems like the only way out, I'm not gonna lie, but I know I can't.... I know it's not my place to end it all, that's why I give myself a reason to stay, no matter what it is, even if it's stupid, like: I'll say to myself nope, "who's gonna make incredibly funny jokes like you", take it form me, DON'T DO IT! don't end something that can turn out to be so beautiful. 

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