Siren Bay

XV

December 26th | Five days until NYE

My Boxing Day was filled with tradition, the greatest one I had, and I loved it. I treasured it the most. I looked forward to it throughout the whole year; eating all the leftovers from Christmas but in a sandwich.

Somehow, it hit different. It wasn't something you could do throughout the year, like a leftover Easter dinner rolled up in a fresh loaf, or even going to a restaurant and having a meal, then asking to have it all again in some slices of bread. It was a tradition reserved for the Christmas holidays, specifically Boxing Day.

My sandwich was filled with succulent gammon with a side of mash and the last pigs-in-blanket. I paused to savour the precious flavours dancing on my tongue, the aroma delicately wafting past my nose, and the warmth that plunged to the pit of my stomach.

No thoughts of mermaids, secrets, or old friends. I could even tune out Benji's chewing next to me, and Leah slurping her drink, and fully lose myself in my food.

I wasn't stalling at all from the inevitable catch up with Carrie in only a few hours' time. Not at all. I was just slowly, bite by bite, enjoying my sandwich for as long as I could before I had to leave my home and head to a café in Mona and face someone I'd been running from for six months.

I opened my eyes after I finished chewing – everything tasted better with your eyes closed – to find Leah fixing me with an unshakeable stare. "What?"

"You're stalling."

"No I'm not–"

Leah held her hand up. "Sylvia, if you take another five minutes to eat a bite of a sandwich that you should have finished thirty minutes ago, I'm taking it off you and throwing it in the bin."

Benji glanced up from his now finished plate. "She's right, you've been stalling."

I looked between my two best friends and sighed. "Okay! Yes, I'm stalling."

"Good, you're at the first stage of acknowledgement," Benji smiled. "Now you need to head to the second stage; getting your ass in gear because you have places to be."

I put my unfinished plate to the side. "It's...it's Carrie, though."

"Yes, yes, your old friend who you haven't seen since your birthday when you went missing for two nights."

"Benji," I sighed. "It's a little hard for me to not be anxious over this."

Leah watched me as Benji cocked his head to the side, and shrugged. "Actually, yeah, I see your point," he said.

I turned to Leah. "What?" She was still staring at me.

"If you feel that sick about seeing Carrie, why are you going?" Leah asked.

This time I didn't hesitate in my answer. I remembered Henry's words: You can't hide forever, you have to forgive yourself. He was right. I had an opportunity to clear the air between Carrie and myself, and I couldn't run from what happened any longer.

I had to move on.

And I told her as such. "It's something I have to do," I added on, watching Benji and Leah exchange a look. "What? What did I say? What's that look for?"

The two of them looked at me, and then glanced at each other again. I rolled my eyes. "I hate when you two do that."

"It's an ability we've gained over time, you know," Leah smirked at me. "Being around you we needed telepathic communication to talk about when you were being idiotic."