Short Stories With Alice

A Barista's Love

I submitted this short story for a national anthology submission panel a few years ago. It was not chosen to be a part of the collection. Therefore, I am able to post it online for free for readers to enjoy. This does have some T/W for Homophobia. Lastly, I wrote this in one sitting, the day before the closing deadline!

When I think of the word Pride, I think of many things: Celebration, joy, happiness. But when I remember that not everything in my world is colourful, I turn to the one place that allows me to be myself. The cafe nearest to my house, the place of safety, warmth and the temptation to sip a variety of hot drinks before I have to make the journey back home. I wanted to watch that documentary, the one where two young people travel to places around the world to visit those living in the Queer communities. Why? Because I, sixteen year old Gemma Devons, identifies herself as Queer. However, living with a family that doesn't understand my place in the LGBTQIA+ community, I have to be careful what I watch on the family TV and what internet searches I make on the home computer.

Up until recently, I hadn't really thought about falling in love. I had witnessed first-hand my closet friends, texting me till the early hours of the morning. Those messages were long, ones that spoke of passion and excitement. Only to receive an update the following day, with crying emojis to say that actually, it wasn't really true love. Events were being planned in my hometown to mark Pride, the first in a long while. Lots of young people and support workers in the community were putting on events, sort of like a long carnival. But really, it was just a short walk down the high street with lots of us planning to wave the flag, the rainbow, the one that I really have been tempted to place on the bedroom wall. For fear of my closet family discovering it, I haven't been able to do so. So yes, there was me, sixteen, never been kissed, never been on a date. Instead, I was the girl who always had to carry a box of tissues around the school corridors to comfort my friends with their broken hearts. I'm not used to being the one crying, rather the one trying to stop the crying.

It was luck of the draw in my view, that events of Pride started to get planned so soon after Valentine's Day. The shop on the corner, created a beautiful display of photos and decorations to celebrate the upcoming events. I snapped a quick photo on my iPhone which sits proudly in my photos still. I like to look at it daily, the pictures of couples holding hands and kissing on city streets as from all around, the clapping of hands and the carrying of banners fits the scene well. Many people care, many people are part of this community. Many, like me, have a near silent voice. That was, until I met the one that changed all that.

Three days after the big 14th February events, it was a cold, damp morning as I made the walk to school. Not far away from my front door, so there wasn't any excuse in not being there. On this morning however, I wasn't there. A group of teens, all on their mountain bikes and smoking fags, started badmouthing about a girl I used to know from school. She had been a lesbian, fallen in love with another girl, bullied online and then, she took her own life. It was one remark from one of the taller boys that startled me the most.

"Anyone else like her, just aren't welcome in this world."

I physically stopped dead in my tracks as my gaze rested towards the laughing teens. The next minute, I could smell burning coming from the park gate, they were trying to burn one of the rainbow flags!

Where they got it from, I had no idea but soon, I was running, determined not to look back in case they were planning to chase me. Pounding heart, the heavens suddenly started to bucket down with heavy rain. Where could I go for some shelter? Anxious thoughts crisscrossed my mind, until one place came into view. My favourite cafe. The only issue was this: Would they turn me away because I wasn't at school?

There was only one way to find out, I had to go in and see for myself.

On pushing open the door, my nostrils were immediately hit with the fresh scent of coffee. There were other customers in there either drinking or working on laptops. Luckily, my laptop was tucked away safety in my rucksack. Well, it was an old laptop belonging to a close friend of my family that I managed to nab before he sold it off to someone else. But, I'm not a thief, just trying to... fit in...If you count me hiding away from horrid teens a method to fit in. Taking off my soaked raincoat and brushing the tips of my soggy hair, I plonked myself down at a table away from preying eyes of passers-by. Plugging my laptop in, I logged onto my blog. A hidden secret of mine that up until this moment of writing this memory to share, I hadn't told a single soul what I was doing behind the scenes. Inspired by the upcoming film Love Simon, I created a personal blog of me as a Queer teen, living my life each day and just moments of positive events that happened in the community. The blog does have somewhat of a following but there are the moments when a troll comes along, spewing hate in the comments section which really makes me sigh with frustration.