Serendipity [BoyxBoy]

Chapter Ten

Jameelah did not deal with loss well, this was one thing she knew about herself.

It didn't really matter who it was or even what it was, the prospect of someone or something no longer existing filled her with an overwhelming sense of sadness.

She rarely ever cried and, when she did, she made sure she was alone. Not being able to deal with loss well didn't mean she bawled her eyes out at the mention of the deceased's name. It was just the sadness that ate her up from the inside. Jamee likened it to a parasite feasting on what little light she had in her, gobbling up all her joy until all that was left was a huge, gaping hole.

She survived by shutting down (it was much better than crying in her opinion). When she couldn't deal with something, she didn't deal with anything at all. It was best to breeze through her days like a spec of dust-small and untethered-- than to remain solid enough to think about all she had lost.

When they lost Simi, Jamee shut down again.

She didn't cry at the hospital when Simi went from coma to seizure to dead. She didn't cry at the funeral when her (now late) friends mother tried to jump into the grave. She didn't cry when she stared down at her nails, dirty with the sand she'd thrown over the casket.

Crying sucked. It was better to shut down.

And that was why they were in Benin City with Jorəʊmi, because Ada thought they needed a break from Lagos.

Because she was living mist. Because MJ had forgotten how to remain sober. Because their sadness was choking Ada.

Jamee wasn't complaining.

If they were going to get fucked up, it might as well be in a different location.

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The best part about walking Uvo was that he was never in a hurry to get anywhere. Uvogin wasn't like Nosa's grandfather's dog, Whiskey, who rushed towards the road whenever he spotted a car. Uvo remained by his side, keeping pace with them and only occasionally stopping to sniff at something on the side of the road.

The roads weren't so busy; it was only three in the afternoon, school run had ended and rush hour hadn't yet begun. The only other pedestrians were a few kids walking home from school who looked like they wanted to pet Uvo but were obviously intimidated by his size.

Usually, Nosa would be fiddling with his thumbs or pretending to read something on his phone in an attempt to hide how nervous being outside made him but, once more, he found his gaze being drawn to Irekan and the anxiety coiled up in his chest loosened until he had no other option but to stare at the boy walking beside him.

Irekan's light brown eyes were wide, taking everything around them with child-like wonder. The way he looked at the mannequin in front of the store that spelled boutique 'butik', you'd think he'd never seen a badly dressed mannequin before. Nosa found himself noting the way Irekan's smile lit up every time a car drove by and Uvo barked, how he chewed the insides of his cheeks when he was thinking. Nosa watched Irekan call a greeting at a shopkeeper and he thought he could probably stare at him forever.

"Benin is so different from Lagos," Irekan acknowledged as they made their way down the road.

"You're from Lagos?" Nosa asked, wincing at the way his voice came out all high pitched and nervous. It wasn't like Irekan could read his thoughts, he didn't have to feel embarrassed for thinking he needed whatever Irekan used to keep his lips pink and plummy. "I didn't know that?"

Irekan casted him an amused glance. "How would you have known? I didn't tell you."

Embarrassment heated his face like Uvo's breath.