Some Thing Called Myself (Complete)

XVIII: something's wrong

Ch. 18: Something's Wrong

Jano looked from Mara to Bernardo, Director Elena, Tai, Mirtes, and Godo in turn. Finally, after a whole, uncomfortable minute of silence, he let out a long and tired sigh.

"You can't be serious," Jano said. "Do you really want to bring me back to this atrocious place because of this? After everything that...." He huffed and shook his head.

Mara died a little as she shifted in her seat. Maybe asking Jano wasn't a good idea. After Bernardo talked to his father and explained the situation to him, Jano, ex-Director of the South American Sents, scheduled a meeting with the entire squad plus Elena. Considering Jano's reaction and the short assortment of sentences he had said since he had arrived, her chances weren't too great.

A wave of discomfort spread in the room. Mara doubted that anyone else felt it as strongly as she.

"I understand you're still recovering, Januário. This whole situation is entirely unconventional," Elena said. No pet names, no softer voice, no coddling. She was as hard with Jano, her husband, as with everyone else. "You don't have to worry about working as Mara's mentor if you don't want to. We'll find a way to—"

"No, no, no," Jano interrupted. "Please. It's not that. I adore Mara, and I'm overjoyed with the idea. I'm just very disappointed in all of you—not you, of course, honey," he said, looking at Elena, "but you." He faced Mara's squad. "I'm disappointed you made your squad mate so uncomfortable that she decided to find a mentor elsewhere. The bond between your siblings in arms must be tighter than any other, or else you won't survive out there." He scoffed. "Kerana! With the way things are nowadays, you might not even survive inside the HQ." To that, Elena shifted in her seat with clear discomfort. Clicking his tongue, Jano completed, "Did you kids forget my welcoming speech already?"

"You gave it some fifteen flesh years ago, Jano," Tai said. "Your speech was not that memorable."

Mirtes elbowed their arm, making Tai wince.

"What? I'm just being honest. Besides, it's not like any of this is our fault. The man gave Mara a weapon that is a fucking legend. No wonder she's so keen to have him as a mentor. If I could find her shortcuts like that, I bet she'd choose me instead."

"Hey!" Mara barked. "I thought about this very carefully, okay? I'm not gullible, Taiguara."

Yes, she was.

"Stop, you two," Bernardo said. He squared his shoulders and ignored Tai's exasperated huff. Still, there was something in the way Bernardo fidgeted with his fingers that made him look very small beside his father. "Mara has seen only the worst of us since she arrived. Tai's punishment, Alessa's attack, a death threat, the fight with the cockroach, and now the pressure we're putting on her."

"Death threat?" Elena echoed. "What death threat, Bernardo?"

"I'll explain it later, Director," Bernardo said. "What I mean to say—"

"Son," Jano interrupted. That short word sounded like a warning.

"I know, Dad; I'm not giving excuses. I couldn't control the situation, and I couldn't help my squad process what happened. It is my fault. All I'm saying is...." he took in a deep breath. "I just wish Mara could have the best mentor for her."

Wait. Was it weird that he looked very attractive right now, speaking softly and taking responsibility for things?

"She thinks that person is you, and if I have to be honest, considering her options"—Bernardo glanced at his mother, then at his father again—"I agree with her. We would all appreciate it if you accepted the role, Dad."