Chapter 3

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1999

I snagged two bottles of beer from David's kitchen and flipped the caps off both, before wandering outside. I probably looked perfectly calm on the outside - I was counting on that - but inside I was a wreck.

I'd fucked it big-time tonight.

I dropped onto the bench in the back garden. It was mid-February and probably freezing, but I'd never really felt the cold. Which was a good thing; I didn't feel like going back into the party anytime soon. I didn't want to risk seeing Iona kissing Gary Johnson again. The image was already imprinted on my brain, and there was a ball of jealousy coiling in my stomach.

I actually felt a bit sick.

"It doesn't look like she's coming, mate," Danny had said to me earlier that night, his face sympathetic. We'd been at the party for nearly two hours and there had been absolutely no sign of Iona or her friends. She hadn't actually been certain she was going to make it, I supposed, but I couldn't help the bitter disappointment swirling around in my brain.

I nodded, resigned. "Seems that way." I accepted a shot of sambuca he poured for me. And then another. I hadn't participated in much underage drinking at that point, so I was understandably a bit of a lightweight.

Who was I kidding anyway? I thought to myself wryly. It's not like Iona had ever given me the idea that she liked me as anything more than a friend. Sure, there had been that moment we'd had at the barbecue all those months ago, but I'd probably been imagining that. I'd wanted to be with her for so long that I was delusional, spotting signs that were never really there. Projecting my own intense feelings onto her.

Maybe I needed to just move on.

I accepted a third shot from Danny and then went in search of a bathroom. In a house this size I figured there had to be at least three. A tipsy blonde girl stumbled out of one of the loos right in front of me in the hallway. She nearly went over on her ankle so I instinctively grabbed her to steady her.

"Thanks! I'm so sorry," she giggled. She glanced up at my face and it seemed that her greeny-blue eyes lit up. "You're Ryan Thorne!" She informed me.

"I am." I nodded solemnly, trying not to smile.

She held out a hand. Her fingernails were long talons, bright red and sparkling like disco balls. They made me think wistfully of Iona's nails which were far shorter and usually painted some sort of pale pastel shade that often reminded me of ice cream. The other day they'd been mint green. "I'm Christine," the girl grinned. "I've been wanting to meet you for a while."

I seemed to have acquired somewhat of a reputation that I didn't deserve over the last couple of years. A lot of girls seemed to think I was the school stud or something (the rest of them thought I was gay because I'd avoided kissing them, remember?). It just messed with my head as nothing could be further from the truth.

But regardless of whether it was fact or fiction, everyone knew who I was now, including this girl Christine who I'd never met before. Which was very unsettling. I didn't really enjoy the attention.

Awkwardly I excused myself to go into the bathroom but she was waiting for me when I came back out, leaning against the wall opposite. "You're really quite intriguing, Ryan Thorne," she said. I wasn't sure if her confidence was due to the high levels of alcohol in her system, or she was just naturally like that. I was a little bit scared of her. Either way, she snaked an arm around my waist to pull me closer and started to kiss me.

I wanted to pull back and protest. She wasn't Iona, and it didn't feel right. But Iona wasn't here and despite myself, my body was still responding to the hot blonde girl sliding her tongue into my mouth. We were right in the middle of the entrance hall, and I'm pretty sure I heard someone cheer at the public display. I was also vaguely aware of a doorbell ringing, of a blast of cold air pushing its way through the hall as the door opened and closed behind some latecomers.

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