Stories Written In The Dark

SLEEPOVER SURVIVAL TIPS (For Kids)

Hi! So you want to have a sleepover with me? Cool! I love sleepovers! Oh, but you have to follow the rules, okay? The monsters don't like it when people don't follow the rules. Here you go:

1. Keep your stuffed toy nearby at all times during your stay. This includes going to the bathroom or eating dinner. Please ensure the toy is sanitary and that you have a strong positive emotional attachment to it. 

2. When you get to the house, a child should be waiting for you. If there is an adult, show them your stuffed toy. Should they look scared or even try to run, you are not to enter the house. Turn around, walk back to the street, and try again. If all is well, go inside with the adult. 

3. If you're still alive at this point, your escort is probably not a monster. You can talk to it if you like. 

3. Don't yell, scream, or make any other loud noises while inside the house. If you do, apologize immediately and lower your head so it looks like you're embarrassed at your bad behavior. If you break anything, put the stuffed animal down. It shouldn't have to suffer with you. 

4. After a few minutes, you will have reached the dining room. No matter what size you think my house is, it's a lot larger on the outside, so don't be surprised. Maintain proper decorum while eating. Don't talk while eating, and do not spit your food out. Doing this will result in being grounded. Those chains are really uncomfortable.

5. When you're done eating, thank the cook for the meal. If they are satisfied with your good behavior, a beautiful black cat will appear from the shadows. Thank them. If there is no cat, your night is gonna get a whole lot harder.

6. If the cat has green eyes, they are capable of seeing into the other world. They will be your guide. Should the cat have red eyes, they will be a protector that will take care of you and destroy anyone who hurts you. With this one, you must set clear limits as to what they are allowed to do, to avoid any mishaps. If the cat has no eyes, they can negotiate with the monsters. It can read human minds and speak telepathically to you.  

7. Do not hurt the cat on purpose. I'll kill you faster than the monsters ever could. 

8. When you go upstairs, wait five minutes. The residents are preparing your room. If you walk into the hallway before the five minutes is done, you will suffer irreversible damage to your mind. Looking into the true nature of reality isn't something most people can walk away from unscathed. 

9. Once the five minutes are over, I'll appear behind you and lead you to the room. We can talk about whatever you want, but you have to remain near me. Some monsters may not know you're my guest. 

10. When we reach your room, you need to close your eyes while I look around. The residents aren't exactly the best stylists, and some of their more esoteric design choices can destroy your sanity. 

11. If the cat is with you, it will walk inside. Allow them to sleep wherever they wish as long as both you and the cat are comfortable. 

12. By now the time will be 10:00 PM. Disregard anything your watch tells you. It is not to be trusted. From here till midnight, we can play and do whatever we want. The bathroom's joined, so that's not an issue. 

13. If you wish to leave my bedroom, I can understand. This house has many beauties, but just as many dangers. Make sure to take the cat and stuffed toy with you, and listen to anything it attempts to communicate to you. If you didn't get the cat, I feel sorry for you. This house really is something. A shame you will never see it. 

14. If you left the room, both you and the cat should be back before midnight.

15. When the clock strikes midnight, sleep. Change into something more comfortable if you can. Wear nothing if you wish. As long as you're comfortable and not moving around much. 

16. No matter how well you sleep, you will awaken before dawn in a world without light. I will try to help you as much as I can, but unless the cat's with you, you're on your own from here (and the toy). First things first, ignore any creepy whispering. Do not attempt to translate anything, and for the love of all that is holy, do not replicate the whispers. First rule the Lady Of The House taught me: Never summon something you can't banish. 

17. If the cat has green eyes, they will exude a soft glow. Follow it wherever it goes. No matter what. Only follow the path it follows. Should you wander off, you will be lost forever. If you do this correctly, you'll be out before the sun rises. 

18. If the cat has red eyes, they will follow you around, even if you can't see it. Feel free to walk anywhere until you find the exit. This can take between a few minutes and a few years, so don't feel discouraged if you don't get it on the first try. 

19. If the cat has no eyes, they will leave you upon entering this realm. Do not leave your spot when this happens. Remain in that place until they return. If they return, they have discovered the exit and will take you to it. 

20. If you do not have the cat, you will have to rely on the toy to help you. Hold the toy in every direction, and note any sudden feelings. A cold chill, or an abrupt desire to look away, will be the way to go. Walk the path the toy shows you, and hold it forward at all times, no matter how much your arm aches from doing it. If you run into any entities, run. That's the only thing you can do. 

21. During your travels in this unfamiliar labyrinth, you may encounter several inhuman entities. Their reactions to you will differ based on personal choices and the cat. However, no matter what, avoid looking at them for more than thirty seconds. This will reveal their true forms. You don't want to know what happens after. 

22. In this world, there are certain entities to be especially afraid of. The Mad Hatter likes human skin. He thinks it's a good material and will do anything to get more of it. If you run into him, you'll know. He's loud and giggly. If you come across him, laugh with him. He's got bad eyes, and if you laugh with him, he'll laugh back as a joke. This should give you enough time to walk away.

23. Another entity to be afraid of, or more specifically, a group of entities: The Children. When I was younger, I hated sleeping in my room because the Children always stared at me. I didn't know what they wanted. So I sent them here instead. Problem is, here they're way stronger. They'll do everything they can to get you to look at them. Ignore them entirely. Treat them as if they don't exist, because they don't. 

24. The Twisted One is probably the most interesting of them all. The thing is, he never appears the same way twice. He's nothing and everything at the same time. If you run into him, your best bet is to walk away as fast as you can and hope he didn't notice you. 

25. When you find the exit (trust me, you'll know when you've found it), pray to any and every god you know of. You'll need all the moral support you can get.

26. When you walk through the exit, you'll be in agony. Just thought I should warn you. 

27. If you made it this far, the sun will have risen. If it hasn't, walk back through the exit and do it again until the sun rises. 

28. Congratulations. You're done! You have earned a cat with powerful arcane abilities and a lifetime of fame and wealth. Was it worth it? I hope so! Thanks for playing with me. Come again soon!