Frostbite

Cole

I lead Laiken over to a table near the concession stand. She sits down. I sit across from her. Neither of us say a word for a least five minutes. I finally pipe up. "Collins, did you see the way I played today? I was terrible. You were the only thing running through my mind that entire practice. What's going on with you? Is it our relationship? Are you leaving me?" I pout. Laiken hangs her head down low. Her eyes focus on everything but me. She twiddles her thumbs underneath the table. "If you're not going to tell me, I'll ask your coach what's wrong. She's already going to be mad when she finds out you're seeing me without her permission. You know how our coaches are about dating". Laiken finally looks at me. Not in the eyes though. More so looking through me but I take it how it is. "Please don't talk to coach. I'm already in enough shit with her as it is. She yelled at me for downplaying my jumps today" Laiken sobs. "Then tell me what's wrong. Maybe I can fix it". I'm trying to get her to trust me. She starts to cry. "This is something you can't fix, Cole. No one can fix this mistake". "What do you mean, honey?" Laiken looks at the ground again. "Cole, I don't know how to tell you this". I wait until she's ready to open up. "I'm pregnant".

The only thing running through my mind right now is the thought of not being able to go off and play for my dad's favorite team. What if he takes my truck away? What if he never lets me see Laiken ever again? Even worse, what if he kills me? I know those thoughts are ridiculous but to me, they seem valid in this moment of time. "How far along are you?" I ask. "I'm not sure. Maybe like five weeks? I haven't been to the doctors yet. I just found out this morning" She grumbles. "Did you tell your mom yet?" "No. I took the test and left for school" she says, now sounding a bit annoyed with me. "Can I see it? Do you have it with you?" Laiken gets up from the table. "Do you not believe me, Beckett? Fine then. Here!" Laiken takes the pregnancy test out of the front pocket of her skate bag and chucks it down. The test bounces off the table and lands face up on the floor of the arena about ten feet from where we were sitting. In that very moment, Brian just so happened to walk by. He picked the test up, reaching his arm out to hand it to me. "Are you guys alright? I came to check on you. We can hear you guys all the way across the arena" Brian implies. I snatched the test away from him. "Yeah. We're f-f-fine. N-n-now go away, dude" I say, stumbling over my words at this point. I was really hoping he didn't catch a good glimpse of the results.

After about a half an hour of talking to Laiken and trying to calm her down, we get up and leave the arena. The once smiley Laiken is no more. She's just been frowning. I can still see the emotional pain on her face. I offer my hand on our way to her Mazda but she declines. Instead, her hands stay in her Skate Stellar jacket pockets. It saddens me to see her this way. I'm not sure what to do or say at this point. After helping her to her car, I head to my truck on the opposite end of the parking lot. I can't find it in me to play my typical up beat country music on the way home. Instead, I drive in silence doing exactly the speed limit so I could drive just a little longer and debrief with myself.

Dad greets me in the driveway. He must've just finished work. He notices that I don't look like my usual self. "Everything okay, son?" dad asks as soon as I get out of the truck. "Yup. Everything is fine, dad. Don't worry about a thing" I say, trying not to burst into tears. I sprint up the stairs as soon as I enter the house, not even taking the time to remove my shoes at the front door. Madison sees me high tail it to my room. I slam my bedroom door shut, drop my bag on the floor and hydroplane onto my bed. She knocks on my door three times. "Go away, Maddie" I say in a calm voice. "Do you need me to get mom?" Madison asks through the crack of the door. "No. Mom is the last person I want to see right now. Please go" I cry. Madison lets herself in anyways. I don't put up a fight and just accept that she isn't planning on leaving anytime soon. Madison pulls my desk chair out from under my desk and sits on it. "I know I'm not going to understand everything you tell me but you can vent if you'd like". Madison is aware she won't grasp such an adult conversation. I don't dare to tell her Laiken is pregnant, but I release my thoughts to her. She stares at me the entire time, listening and trying to take in as much as her brain allows her to take in.

Eventually I run out of words to say. She's still sitting there waiting for me to keep rambling about 'nonsense' in her world. Madison sees my bag sitting on the floor. She walks over to it. My head is still stuffed in my pillow. Madison, thinking she's helping me, picked up my bag to go hang it on the back of my door. I heard something falls out of it. She scooped it up and tapped me on the back. "This fell out when I picked your bag up, Cole. What is it?" I roll over onto my side. She's standing there holding Laiken's pregnancy test. "Uh. It's nothing, Maddie. Don't worry about it. Can I have that?" I snap. Just as I go to reach for the test, mom barges into my room. "What's going on in here? Dinner is ready. I've been calling for you guys". Mom sees Madison holding the test in her hand. "Maddie honey, can I please see what you've got in your hand?" Madison looked at me, then gives it to mom. I burry my face into my pillow once again. "Madison, can you go help your father set the table?" mom asks calmly. Madison grins and skips out of my room.

Mom closes the bedroom door. She sits down on my bed beside me. I can feel her lean over and start to rub my back. "Cole? Is this yours?" She asks. I let out a sniffle, still keeping my head stuffed in my pillow. "Baby, please talk to me. I'm here to help you" mom reassures me. I remove my head from beneath my pillow and make full eye contact with her. "Its Laiken's. She took it this morning" I confess. Mom gives it back to me. The sheer look of disappointment is visible on her face, but she doesn't say a word about what she's probably feeling deep down inside. She's still sitting on my bed. All I want to do is hug her and tell her how sorry I am for disappointing her and dad but I can't. I'm a statue. After another minute or so of pure silence, mom stands up and lets me know dinner is ready. She walks out of my room, closing the door behind her.

I lay completely still until I can't hear the sound of mom's footsteps anymore, then I sit up and attempt to gather myself. I can't face my family just yet, so I decide to skip dinner all together. Everyone's upset with me. Laiken, my mom, even my own self. I don't understand how this could've happened. How could I have been so stupid? Suddenly, my phone starts buzzing in my backpack. I slide myself off my bed and bend down to pick up my bag. Upon reaching in and pulling out my phone, the buzzing stops. I read the text across the screen. Its Laiken. I don't have it in me to call her back so I decide to shoot her a text instead.

Cole: Hey sorry I missed your call. Eating dinner.

I lie. She reads my text right away and replies.

Laiken: Its okay. Meet me at Brian's in half an hour. We need to talk.

I thumbs up her message, letting her know I'll be there.