SHADOW OF MYSELF

Chapter Three

Felix POV

Disappointment gnawed at me as Prisca sat there silently. I'd hoped to hear about her dreams, but she remained tight-lipped.

Maybe I'd pushed too hard.  Still, I couldn't help but feel a strange sense of foreboding – a feeling that intensified as she abruptly stood up.

"Maybe another time," she mumbled, avoiding my gaze. "My mom's picking me up soon."

Before I could protest, she was gone, leaving me with a tangled mix of frustration and… was it concern?  There was something undeniably unsettling about her sudden withdrawal.

Sitting next to her for what felt like an eternity, though it was probably only six minutes, I watched her gather her things. 

The silence stretched between us, thick and suffocating.  Was she judging me in her heart, finding it unpleasant to tell me her dreams?  I couldn't take it anymore.

Clearing my throat awkwardly, I forced a smile.  "It's okay if you don't feel willing to tell me about it," I said, my voice sounding overly eager.  "Maybe when you are more comfortable.  I won't force you. I would love for you to be the one to come around at your own pace, trust me."  I reached out, impulsively patting the back of her palm.

That seemed to get a reaction.  Her head snapped up, and her eyes met mine for the briefest of moments.  There was a flicker of something in them – defiance?  Fear?  It was gone as quickly as it appeared, replaced by a mask of indifference.

"You're right," she said coolly.  "Maybe some other time.  I must get going, I have to be outside when my mom comes to pick me up.  Have a great time!"  She offered a tight smile that didn't reach her eyes and walked out of the library without a backward glance.

My smile faltered.  There was something about her quick dismissal, the way she seemed to be hiding something, that gnawed at me. 

She was definitely strong-willed, and not easily compelled to do things outside her will.  That much was clear. 

But it also meant she would continue to have those disturbing dreams, trapped in her own mind, if she wouldn't open up and let me help.

Prisca POV

Several minutes had ticked by since Felix started rambling on about understanding and patience. 

A part of me, a small, begrudging part, had to admit he seemed considerate.  Maybe I had been quick to judge him, assuming he just wanted to flirt.  There sure was a different side to him, a surprisingly gentle one.

Even with this newfound realization, the idea of sharing my secrets with him still felt wrong. 

The dreams were too personal, too disturbing.  There were things I didn't understand myself, and a voice deep within me urged caution.  This secret, whatever it was, felt like a burden I had to carry alone.

With a sigh, I pushed myself to my feet.  "You're right," I said, mimicking his earlier words.  "Maybe some other time.  I need to get going. I have to be outside when my mom comes to pick me up.  Have a great time!"  It felt hollow on my tongue, but it served its purpose.

Leaving Felix behind, I practically ran out of the library, a wave of relief washing over me as the heavy oak doors swung shut behind me. 

I needed to find Elizabeth, to talk to someone, anyone, about the turmoil churning inside me.

Spotting her in the distance, huddled over a table with a group of girls, I called out her name.  Her head snapped up, worry creasing her brow as she saw my face.