Remembering You

Daughter Dearest

A little girl with pigtails pulled me out of my pizza-induced tirade of distance from Jason in my head. She was staring at me, confused, her little head quirked. I only then realized she had been staring for quite some time.

"Do you need pizza?" I asked her, offering her a piece. She was still small, but she looked old enough to eat it. She shook her head and swung her ragged toy rabbit absently with her one not-broken arm.

"Daddy said you were an angel now," she said curiously.

I shook my head at the gall of some men. "Why would he say that? I'm not dead, am I? Why would your daddy care where I am anyway? I'm sure the doctor you have is great," I said, taking a large bite of my third slice of pizza. I had not eaten a real meal in so long that my hunger had started to consume me, but I didn't even realize it until I started eating.

"You're sure you're not dead, mommy?" The piece of pizza I was eating dropped instantly from my hands, realizing what she called me. She didn't wait for my response, deciding she was comfortable enough with my not-dead status to climb on my lap.

"Sera?" I asked, shocked, not having anticipated her being in this wing, let alone actually meeting her. She looked up at me and grinned the cutest grin imaginable, responding to her name and giving me a one-armed hug. I hadn't mentally prepared myself for that. I had figured when I would see her I would get to psyche myself up or perhaps not even meet her at all with how much of a dick Jason was being. Yet, here she was in the flesh, her adorable small self helping herself to my lap as if she owned it.

I looked at Trisha, but she didn't realize my panic. I realized she wasn't in on the whole I lost my memory thing. Kennedy was busy braiding a little girl's hair for the third time since I had gotten in, and she couldn't make up her mind how she wanted it, so he was no help either.

She curled up in my lap and yawned a lazy wide yawn and fell asleep happy and content.

Jason wouldn't be able to keep me from her. There was no way it would happen. I didn't need to remember her to know she was mine.

"I thought you lost your memory. For days, we all thought you were dead. Actually, the rumors have been crazy, but you actually look pretty good! You even finally have a little bit of a belly from those babies!" Trisha said, shortly.

"I did actually lose my memory. Not die, obviously...wait...did you say babies? I was pregnant with twins?" I asked, shocked for some reason. It didn't really change much since I didn't remember them at all, but I was just assuming it was one baby I lost. Though the file had said fetuses so I shouldn't have been too shocked. I just assumed it was a typo or something.

"Yes...so you can't remember anything? How did you know she was yours then? Crap, I probably should have warned you or something. You came in here like you owned the place, I just assumed all was well," she said, her eyes widening, realizing I really was damaged. I didn't really look it, but some wounds were deeper than skin.

"Yeah, you are pregnant with twins."

"Was," I corrected blankly.

"I'm so sorry Anna...you were so excited...though you probably don't remember that. Still sucks," she said, seeming genuinely disappointed for me. I brushed it off, not wanting to linger on the past. I couldn't even remember when my future was curled up and sleeping soundly in my arms.

"Never mind. It's funny. I don't remember anything about her...but I guess I don't really need to, do I? Some things are just instinct, I suppose," I said, musing the little angel on my lap. Trisha smiled, looking at her fondly and nodding in agreement.

"I suppose that's why they call it mother instinct and not mother knowledge. No previous experience or memories needed to start. Is your husbnad handeling things well?" she asked, one of the kids crashing on her lap, giving a massive yawn, getting ready for their own sleep time.

"Not really. I think he would prefer I just outright died. He wants nothing to do with me," I admitted softly, brushing the hair out of Sera's round, chubby face.

"Oh dear...you just got the short end of the stick, didn't you? Wait, so you can't remember anything? Like ANYTHING, girl? And your husband is ignoring you? You got to stand up for yourself and put him in his place! He should be there waiting on you hand and foot!"

I seethed with anger, unable to contain my frustration. "Yeah, try telling that to him. He's a total dickfaced selfish jerk that is only capable of thinking about himself. He can go find a hole and die for all I care," I spat bitterly, my gaze drifting to my sleeping angel, Sera, wondering how something so beautiful could have come from such a place of darkness.

Kennedy's silence hung heavy in the air, broken only by the sudden appearance of Jason, his face twisted with fury. "What the fuck are you doing with her? She is not your worry anymore. You were supposed to stay in your room and not leave," he growled coldly, moving to take Sera from my arms.

"Not my worry? She's my flesh and blood! You can't keep her from me," I retorted sharply, refusing to relinquish my hold on my daughter.

Jason's glare bore into me, his eyes ablaze with anger. "A moment, if you will?" he snapped, his voice cutting through the tension like a knife. The two nurses scattered away, wisely avoiding his wrath.

"I have a whole troop of doctors ready to testify that you are not mentally ready to handle her. You are to leave her alone. I don't know what game you are playing, but she is a living creature. Not a toy," Jason spat, his words dripping with venom.

His hatred and rage washed over me, but beneath it all, I felt an undeniable pull towards Sera, a connection that transcended reason. "No... Please..." I pleaded desperately, refusing to surrender my daughter.

"Anna, stop...NOW! Give her here!" Jason demanded, his voice filled with authority yet tinged with restraint.

She didn't even wake from her sleep as I sheltered her, shielding her from any potential harm. My fear for her safety eclipsed any fear I felt for myself. I braced for the blow, waiting for the inevitable strike, but it never came.

Instead, Jason's demeanor softened, and his vulnerability laid bare for a fleeting moment. He ran his hands through his hair in frustration, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Anna, do you remember her?" he asked softly, a note of hope in his voice.

I relaxed slightly, ready to cling to Sera once more at a moment's notice. "If I say yes, will you let me see her again?" I asked, my desperation evident in every word.