The Big Book of 350 Insults & Comebacks

This book isn't copyrighted as 99% of everything in here isn't mine. Enjoy and I hope they come in useful, im going to leave the book uncompleted, so if you want a comeback or insult in here just comment or messege me and I'll put it in! (: This book does include a few swear words be warned... Bold is another persons response.

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1. Twinkle twinkle little whore, shut your legs they ain't a door.

2. Roses are red, violets are blue, I have five fingers but the middle ones for you.

3. If im ever drunk, you'll be damn good-looking.

4. Your mum/dad!

5. Oh, this is coming from the poster child for abortions?

6. Oh this is coming from the person that fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down?

7. I can get plastic surgery to fix my ugliness, you on the other hand will be stupid for eternity.

8. I don't know what makes you stupid, but it works!

9. Oh my god! It spoke!

10. Oh im sorry I didn't get that, I don't speak idiot.

11. If I wanted a bitch i would've brought a dog.

12. You have a face not even a mother could love...

13. Hey your village called, they want you back by 6...

14. Who pissed in your Cherrios?

15. You know what I would find if I looked up idiot in the dictionary? A picture of you? No a definition of an idiot, which you are.

16. You make the guys on Jackass look like Einstein...

17. Oh im sorry. Was I meant to be offended? The only thing offending me is your face...

18. I would call you a retard, but that would be offending retards.  

19. Im already visulizing ductape over your mouth.

20. Oh your such a beautiful, wonderful, intelligent person... Oh im sorry i thought we were having a lying competition?

21. Your a dork and you know what a dork is? A whales dick, which means you are the biggest dork/dick in the world.

22. Thats not what your mum/dad said last night.

23. Oh yeah, if im lesbian then your drop dead fucking gorgeous.

24. Your ugly. Apparently the image of you in the mirror is burned into your skull, and holy crap your right!

25. I've been called worse by better.

26. You must've been born on a highway, that's were most accidents happen.

27. Well your day has been a waste of make-up.

28. If your going to be two-faced atleast make one of them pretty.

29.I would slap you but I dont want to make your face look any better.

30. I'd slap you but that would be animal abuse.

31. No, you still look ugly. Im sorry, I cant do anything about it.

32. What did you eat this morning for breakfast? Bitch Flakes?

33. Sorry, I cant put small things in my mouth or I'll choke.