TW: discussions of depression and grief (in a therapy setting)
This chapter goes into the situation of Eli's parents' death. There is nothing here merely for shock value, just don't want anyone to be caught off guard.
***
November 2024
"Talk me through your first depressive episode."
We've been at this for three years.
The first time I came to Dr Wooding, after I moved, I still couldn't talk about any of it. But Dr Wooding says being able to talk about things is important. Telling the story over and over will help me take power away from 'the trauma'. Help me heal.
So I humor him.
We still talk about the normal things - how was your week, it was fine, how is the team, it's fine, how was the game, it was fine. But if I don't mention anything to set the tone for the appointment, he tries again.
The first time, I shut down after two sentences. I've had more practice since, though.
"It was after they died."
"Your parents," Dr Wooding speaks softly.
"Mh."
"How was that?"
"Their death?"
"The whole thing. Whatever you want to share."
I take a deep breath in. Short, factual sentences at first.
"I was sixteen. They were going out on date night. They always had date night on Fridays. Saturdays sometimes, if they had something else on Friday. I was staying at Owen's. Dean was staying with us too. Elliott had the house to himself. He invited some friends over. They were playing poker."
"Okay."
"We went to bed earlier than usual. We were going to meet the other guys at the rink in the morning. Owen's mom came into the living room to wake me up. Dean woke up too. Owen's mom said Elliott had been at the door‐ Actually, Dean was already up. He woke up with the doorbell, not Mrs Holmes."
"That's okay."
"She said Elliott got a call from the hospital. My parents had taken the car, so Owen's dad drove Elliott. They had already left so I had to wait. Dean called his dad. He drove me. Dean and Owen came too."
"Did your friends asked to go with you?" Dr Wooding interrupts gently.
"I asked them."
"And they said yes?"
I nod. "Owen was still half-asleep. But they both came."
"That was kind of them."
"Yeah. They're always there."
Dr Wooding nods. He's writing something on his notes. "Want to continue?"
"When I got to the hospital the doctors were talking to Owen's dad. Elliott was sitting down. His eyes were red but he wasn't crying. He didn't talk to me."
"Did you try to talk to your brother?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"I was focusing on the doctors. And Owen's dad."
"What about them?"
"He kept looking at me. Owen's dad."
"Did that bother you?"
"A bit."
"Why?"
"It was the look in his eyes. I just knew."
YOU ARE READING
Crack In The Ice
Random**SEQUEL TO BREAKING THE ICE** Liam Astor is home. Home where his family is. Home where is skating partner stayed. Home where he trains every day to make his Olympic dreams come true. Home, where he had to throw himself into his career, so he doesn'...
