Foolishly Falling for You

14

Lance

She's fine, and that makes this even worse. I watch her closely, so closely, I'm seeing things I never have before. She has a faint beauty mark near her eye, and I'm not sure when she got it, but she did not have it when we were young.

She must be used to it. The pain of it all. So used to it, that it doesn't even make her steps falter.

I hate that. It makes my throat itch like it's closing. The sensation puts me in the mind of when I eat peanuts. My face is hot, my body is uncomfortable, and my throat closing.

Am I...does her being like this give me Hay fever? Does she have hay fever? 

She heads to the office, sitting by the window. I sit next to her, at her feet. At some point, I will receive a summons soon. How can I lead a fleet if I'm not there. But I leave her, I fear she'll disappear in some great and tragic way, and I can't abide by that.

So for now, I sit next to her, my eyes closing. I didn't sleep at all. I kept seeing her body, so much pain in that fragile frame. She is a Duke's Daughter, she should have no knowledge of pain like this. Even soldiers with as many experiences in war as we are old, could withstand something like this.

And yet...this woman, small as she is, giving as she is, lets her eyes rove the page. Household expenses. Her pen hovers over the line. 

She's doing math.

She's doing math right now. What the hell? 

"Is this really the best use of your time," I ask.

She does not answer me. I huff, closing my eyes once more. Talking to people isn't my strong suit. She does not mind me, my head on her leg. 

I wonder if this is all my fault. Logically it must be. If I had been there if I was paying attention if I'd done half the things she'd asked for things wouldn't have gotten to this state.

So then, above all, it's my responsibility to at least return her to her original state. After decades of unwavering love, the least I can do is undo the damage I've done. 

I must. She spends hours here. Doing paperwork. At least it's sedentary. I don't ask if she's sent for the doctor, because I know she hasn't. 

She smells like roses.

"Are you not bored?" She muses after a while. 

I shrug, resting my arm on my propped-up knee. "Boredom means nothing terrible is happening." 

"Except the boredom, itself" She smirks. I look up at her, raising my brow. 

"Does boredom vex you?"

My wife sighs but doesn't answer the question. She's making that a habit. I strongly dislike it. We sit in quiet, my stomach rumbling.

She scoffs. "I see you did more arguing than eating at breakfast."

Perhaps so. Even still, if I move from this spot, I'm certain she will do something devious. I did not know she had a side like that. I don't like it.

"What is your grand plan?" I ask, my eyes closed.

"To dump you in the sitting room, and go to meet my French lover and give him all your money."

I frown deeply, opening my eyes. "...Really?"

She rolls her eyes. "No. Not yet anyway." 

Not...yet. Where could she have met a Frenchman anyway? French...

French?

"Will you go eat? Your rumbling stomach is disturbing my work,"

She scratches a number, and I peek over at it. "500 gold for the orphans? Pray tell what have the orphans ever done for us?"

She narrows her eyes at me. "You can't be serious."

I blink. I am very serious, but she seems so dismayed I raise my hands in surrender. "I am not serious."

I am very serious, I have never encountered a helpful orphan in all my days.

She scoffs. "Despicable."

"Practical," I quip. 

"Practically heartless," She stands, treading on my legs as she does. I look over her body. She needs to eat. She looks malnourished. 

Her dress rests on me as she steps over me. I pull on it gently. She slaps my hand away with a scoff, stalking away. 

I smirk after her. So much anger in that little frame. Where does she store it? I stand and follow after her, my fingers pinched on the back of her dress. 

"Come on now," I call. "Am I not showing myself to have a bit of heart?"

"Rather than boasting of heart, Lance, I now worry about your lack of brains." She scolds me.

I chuckle. "If I had known such spirited debates awaited me, I would've been bantering before."

"Didn't you promise to obey me?" I muse.

She narrows her eyes. "Didn't you swear to respect me?"

I frown. "Well, do you think you're keeping your end?"

"Do you think you're keeping yours?" She scowls back.

I scoff. "Well, then we're all men of our word then. Except...of course," I nod to her breasts. "Obviously."

She scoffs, shaking me off. "You insufferable--"

"You have suffered me for 20 years," I intone "It is not logical to consider me insufferable--"

She sighs loudly. I smile to myself. Annoying her is...amusing. And I doubt she is bored anymore.

Besides, with her face scrunched up like this, her nose in the air as she calls me every name left out of the good book she looks...

Cute.