BLUE BLOOD

42 | [shannon dragomir]

x

I never meant for it to happen.

I swear.

I never meant to rush out of the room at the sight of her lifeless, crooked body sprawled over the plush carpet of the chambers.

I never meant to.

I just panicked. I panicked, okay?

Now every morning, I wake up to the familiar feeling of guilt.

Growing up, it was made known to the world that I was special. Sure, I wasn't the golden child like Avery. And sure, I didn't have mother doting on me like she did on Tyson. In fact, for some reason, Mother always looked at me with disgust. I never understood. I never did until I met Gabriella Jontas.

Still, I knew I was special. Daddy always told me that. You're special, Shannon. That's what he'd always say. When I asked him why, he never gave me a direct answer. By the time I was a freshman at Queens Erlington Academy, I thought I had my answer.

Gloria was the first to mature her body. We all noticed that summer. I mean, how could we not after she made such a big deal about it? But I realized that I noticed it in a different way.

Needless to say, I pieced it together very quickly.

I liked boys and girls.

I think Avery always knew. I also think that's why I was more protective of him than Tyson because Avery always protected me. He looked out for me. Tyson? Tyson never gave me the time of the day. I think Mother whispered many things in his ears about me.

I went through my first year of high school suppressing half of my feelings. When Helen and Blake got together, our group sort of formed together. Helen, Kalina, Gloria, Satin, and I grew up together, although Satin had been an outsider for quite a while. Blake, Cole, Avery, and Mason made up the boys.

At that point, we weren't officially blue bloods. The older students had not left, but everyone knew we would be next in line.

Cole and I went on a few dates. Nothing serious yet. He was sweet with me. Funny. A side that he never showed much to everyone else. I grew up with him so I never doubted his feelings for me.

Still, I never liked him as much as I liked Clara Jane Laurence Sinclair. Meeting her was like being caught up in wildfire. Chaotic, burning, but beautiful.

She was my best friend.

I chose her.

I thought I'd choose her for the rest of my life.

I broke it off with Cole. He never asked why, but I sometimes wondered if he had always known about Clara Jane and I.

Clara Jane was Clara to me. Always. She'd tell me how she hated anyone else calling me Clara because that was the name only I could use to address her.

Our relationship managed to stay secret until one day, the day Ella died, on the plane, Clara Jane dragged me to a private cabin. I was a little tipsy by then, but happy. I loved parties. Especially parties on Blue Blood Island. Who didn't?

"Hey," I murmured, as Clara Jane shut the door. But any trace of delight washed away from me when I caught the furious look on her face.

"She knows."

I stood still, uncomprehending. "What?"

"Ella Jontas," Clara Jane snapped, stumbling when the private jet hit some altitude. "She knows about...us."

Suddenly, the urge to barf rose. "What?"

Everything started to feel like it was coming down around me. No. No one could know. This would ruin my reputation. I would be shunned. I would be laughed at. I would lose everything and everyone around me. My family would be humiliated.