If I Fall (GirlXGirl)

Chp. 18

As I lied next to Drew in her bed I realized I had never felt so relaxed. We had cooked dinner together and watched a movie while we ate, and it had been so nice and relaxing after a long Friday. Not to mention the fact that it was pouring down outside so staying indoors sounded a lot better than going out and getting drenched.

I found myself silently wondering if Drew enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed hers, but needed to remind myself that she had invited me over. She wanted me around, and that had to mean something. Doubting if she enjoyed being with me was unnecessary because she obviously did, I just needed to believe that.

Then I heard her voice cut through my daydream, "So, has Ashley reached out to you since...?"

I looked at Drew, wondering what had made her think of my ex but shook my head regardless. I answered, "No, she hasn't... why?"

She shrugged, "I don't know, I just had a bad feeling she would..."

I just watched her think something in that magnificent brain of hers before she turned her head towards me again. I could tell she was having contradicting thoughts over my ex whom I haven't thought about since the night at Cielo, but it wasn't the same for Drew.

She asked again, "Are you still considering meeting up with her?"

It was cute to see her nervous but she honestly had no reason to be. I wanted nothing to do with Ashley, and Drew had to know that right? I mean if I wanted her back I would go and get her, and that was the last thing on my mind.

I took her hand, turning on my side to face her, "I was for closure, but if it makes you uncomfortable I won't..."

She shook her head, "N-No, if you need it then by all means... I just... I don't know. I don't want her to hurt you again."

I smiled at Drew's worry, wishing she understood how much I really liked her. I knew I could tell her but I didn't want to scare her away. I was letting her open up to me and take the lead, and even if I felt ready to open up about my feelings maybe she wasn't yet. Of course Boston had been a big step, but we could only take giant leaps within long periods of time, and I wasn't rushing her.

"If the opportunity arises, then I will," I reassured, "But I'm not worrying about her, and you really shouldn't either."

I could tell she needed to hear that considering I knew she was insecure over certain things about herself. Even if she wasn't as affectionate as I liked, or opened up more I still enjoyed her, and I wouldn't want to change her for the world. She was her own person, and I loved the way she was.

She sighed heavily, "I'm sorry."

"For?"

"Worrying... being insecure, or whatever."

I shook my head, "Don't be sorry, I'm glad you told me."

She scooted closer to me, her face only about a foot from mine now, "But I don't want to accidentally discourage you from doing something you might need."