Boys of West Denton ✓

chapter twenty-nine

harris

I feel like such a piece of shit. Why did I jump into the quarry? And why did I make Seb feel like he had to too?

I can't describe the exact feeling that overcame me. I was looking down at the quarry waters, and it just ... it looked so clear. So clear, and pristine, and so, so warm. And in my head, the whole "toxic waters" thing didn't even matter. Just a few minutes would be fine. Others have done it. Repeatedly. And they've had harmless fun each time. But I shouldn't have done that. Shouldn't have jumped, and definitely shouldn't have pressed Seb into following along behind me.

I'm drying off as I run down the side of the hill, still barefoot. There's no one in our area of Lake Franz, so there's no one to see me snatch up me and Seb's shoes. I'm holding a shit ton of stuff in my arms—our towels, our shoes, Seb's keys. I toss them all onto the passenger seat, except for my towel, which I set down on the driver's seat so that the icky quarry water soaking my swim trunks doesn't completely ruin Seb's leather seats. I hope.

I pull out from the parking lot, headed to the little road I know he's bound to be taking. And sure enough, there he is, walking barefoot and looking completely pissed off. Which, honestly, a very valid response. I feel terrible.

I unlock the doors as I pull up alongside him and toss the truck into park. "You wanna drive?" I call out of the rolled-down window.

Seb just shakes his head and hops into the passenger side. Once again, he doesn't move the seat back, so his knees are pressed up against the dash. I almost say something, but with the way he's glowering, decide that now might not be the best time.

"My place?" I ask. I wouldn't be surprised if he wants to go home. I feel like an asshole.

"Yeah, that works." He's staring out the window. I've never seen him like this, not since we've started spending time together. We're into July now—it's the fourteenth today—so it's been over a month. This is so unlike him.

I fucked up.

I turn up his stereo. It blasts Fruit Bats' Humbug Mountain Song, something I know is one of Seb's favorites. But he reaches over and clicks a different CD slot. The first song starts playing, and okay. Did not know he was an Enya fan.

"Are you okay?" I ask him.

"I'll be fine," he mutters. "I just wanna fucking shower. I feel gross."

"I really am sorry. I shouldn't have pressured you like that. I—"

"You didn't pressure me," Seb says. Which is so untrue. I feel like I definitely did, even if it was just a little bit. "I'm an adult. You didn't force me to jump. I wanted to. Seriously"

"But you wouldn't have if not for me. So, I'm sorry I was so insistent. I pestered you, and—"

"Let it go, Harrison." I blink. He's never used my full name before, not that I can recall. "I just wanna go shower."

"You can take my bathroom," I tell him, because I'm pretty sure he doesn't want to shower with me right now. "I'll take my mom's."

"Thanks." Yet another mumble. He is so pissed. And, seriously, I don't blame him.

The rest of the drive back is completely silent. I don't want to make him think that I'm mad at him, or that I'm trying to be spiteful because I can't handle him being mad at me. If anything, I'm mad at myself. I deserve it right now. Even though Seb insists that it's fine, it's not. I feel terrible. I pressured him into jumping into a filthy quarry, and now, I feel like a complete and utter asshole. In all honesty, I am one.