merry christmas, meanie

Therapist talks

Mingyu has never been too fond of liars, no matter the lengths to which they went to prove their point or deny something. Since he's almost too good at seeing right through the layers of lies people spoke as if they were made of brand new glass, it feels like a clumsy act put right in front of his nose.

Especially if said liars are the ones he's supposed to like, love and cherish - be it friends or family, he feels horrible. And currently, Wonwoo falls straight into that category.

It's crystal clear some things have been burdening him a lot more, and the pressure of graduating with a flying degree might have something to do with it, along with the hearty responsibility of raising an entire new life.

Wonwoo somehow still hasn't had the chance to catch up with familiarising himself with balancing being a dad and a top student. And Mingyu just wishes Wonwoo would stop denying any rightful claims Mingyu makes about him having a hard time.

In the world's eyes, Wonwoo is the golden student. Super amiable, approachable, and excels at anything he chooses to do, never capable of insufficiently handling anything. He has always been the doted child in his family too, his younger brother clearly not having followed in his footsteps.

Even between Mingyu and Wonwoo, the latter has always been the highlight of them both, Mingyu often being overshadowed by Wonwoo's perfection. In the crowded hallways back in middle and high school, it was always Wonwoo who got acknowledged by juniors, seniors and teachers alike.

At one point somewhere deep into the past, Mingyu's sure he had been jealous of Wonwoo, jealous of him being ignored next to Wonwoo, and jealous of his talents rarely being noticed in front of Wonwoo's magic hand in anything. But it had never reached to the extent that Mingyu ever felt like taking over Wonwoo in any way. Now, if anything, Mingyu found solace in being the lesser known of the two; he'd rather not have literally each and everyone knowing about him and his talents and charm, having to maintain an image to perfection at every given moment.

Only since Jieun came into picture, Mingyu notices Wonwoo occasionally letting go of his golden image, out of sheer exhaustion and fatigue of having to put up a fake façade just to please everyone around him. And maybe, Wonwoo sometimes considers Mingyu one of the 'everyone' too. What he doesn't seem to realise is that Mingyu has never had the least difficulty in seeing straight through it.

Mingyu knows, Mingyu sees, Mingyu can understand all of it -- Wonwoo having a hard time lately, the compulsion of constantly being under a 'fake it till you make it' situation, and eventually ending up breaking down on the inside, feeling alone, misunderstood and simply tired.

And that's precisely why Mingyu is all ears with every inch of his attention fixated on Wonwoo whenever he willingly reaches out to be heard, understood.

Hence the situation currently, where in Wonwoo has taken his glasses off, and is miserably seated on the couch with his legs pulled all the way to his chest, as he tries to desperately mute his light whimpers. Mingyu has been wordlessly staring at Wonwoo's side profile for the longest time, waiting for the moment Wonwoo begins speaking again.

Mingyu hates it when Wonwoo cries, he doesn't like a sad face on Wonwoo; it has always been that way. Mingyu can't bear to see Wonwoo pained. Wonwoo has been the one to console Mingyu, always, so looking at Wonwoo being sad himself doesn't sit right with Mingyu.

"Okay fuck this," Wonwoo snaps all of a sudden. He still looks terrible, eyes puffy and red, barely dry tears clinging onto his cheeks, as Mingyu curiously observes each of the boy's actions. He knows what's coming.