Running From You

V. All I have

The next few days flew by in a flash. I met Ivan on Friday night, after spending the past days as the perfect child. It was something I had to do if I wanted to keep the peace at home, even when it cost me my own sanity. I went to a pub with Ivan that night, with some of his friends. To be fair, it was quite odd for me to have a date with someone along with their friends, I barely had the time to get to know him as a person. But either way, I still met him the days after. He cleared my mind from all the things I went through at home. He didn't have to put much effort in that, he barely knew what went on behind my front door. All he did was just talk about himself, what he wanted and how he wanted it. I have to be honest when I say it sometimes was a little... too much. But I dealt with it, because it was always better than my problems at home.

It was Sunday night, and once again I was spending my time in Ivan's car. We didn't do much when we were in his car. We just listened to some music, talked, well he talked. All that until his mother called, telling him to get home. I was exhausted, but still went to Ivan when he asked. It somehow felt like a relief to me. "I have to tell you something," Ivan said. It was eleven at night and I had another week of school ahead, just one more week before holiday started. I looked up at Ivan, curious of what he wanted to tell me. "I'm getting deployed in two weeks." He fired the words at me as a bombshell.

"What?" I was unable to think of something.

"They need me for a training in England, it's possible I will be gone for a couple of weeks." Ivan explained further. My eyes narrowed, debating whether he was joking or not but he wasn't holding back his laughter and his face stood still.

"So we have just two weeks before you'll be gone?" I asked softly. Ivan nodded as he lit another cigarette. I inhaled deeply as I thought of how to get through those weeks already. It meant I was back home all the time, a place I tried to escape so hard from. "Well, let's make the most of it, shall we?" I said as I tried to hide my disappointment. Ivan couldn't do much about it, it was his job. Ivan laughed as he looked at me.

"Wanna grab some food? My dad wants some too." Ivan said as he started the engine already. I smiled softly as I hummed. As long as we were just grabbing the food, delivering them and went our own ways again, I was fine. I wasn't prepared to meet his parents anyway. As Ivan drove towards the nearest take out restaurant, I looked out the window, being lost in own thoughts.

What was I going to do if Ivan deployed? Several weeks? It wasn't like he would be gone for just a weekend. Luckily, they only needed him for a training so I didn't have to worry about his safety too. But still, weeks! He would be gone for weeks! Why on earth would you hang out with me so much if you would just leave again? I became frustrated and I really needed to hide it if I didn't want to ruin the night with Ivan, it wasn't his fault my emotions were spiking up and down. He got some food for him and his father and I took a milkshake. I wasn't really hungry. I always lost my appetite when I stressed about something.

"Let's go." Ivan said, getting out of his car.

"What?!" I asked in fear. Why was he getting out of the car, insinuating I was going with him? Wasn't he just delivering the food to his father and then return to me?

"I said, let's go." Ivan said and I froze. I barely did my makeup, my hair is a mess. I put on dirty clothes because I thought we were just hanging out in his car.

"Ivan, I can't." I said as he walked over to my side.

"You'll be fine, they don't care." Ivan said as he grabbed my milkshake from me and unbuckled my seatbelt. His perfume tickled my nostrils and I saw the veins appear on his hands when pushing down the button. My breath left my lungs as I felt hypnotised for a moment. Time stopped as he looked in my eyes before pulling away again. Fuck me.

Ivan grabbed my hand and slowly pulled me out of the car. My heart rate went up as his touch electrified me. My brain went foggy as he was having a fight with his keys. Nowhere in my mind was I prepared to meet his parents, which was something a girl should be prepared for someday. Like, notify her at least? I needed to prepare physically and mentally but I could do none of those things. I saw my reflection in the window and I quickly looked away. I did not want to see all my faults before being confronted by Ivan's parents. "Ivan, shut it!" His dad yelled in a whisper when we entered the house. It was exactly like my house, just mirrored.

"Sorry!"

Ivan lead me the way into the living room, which was kind of pathetic if he'd remember I live in the same house, just on the opposite side of the street.

"Dad, this is Heaven Collin." Ivan introduced me to his father when he handed him the food.

"Please, call me Heaven White." I suggested as I walked over to his father and held my hand out in front of him, trying to hide my chills. I did not like meeting people, I liked it when I knew them a long time.

"Alright," his dad said as he stood up formally and shook my hand. "Hi Heaven, I'm Phil."