Insufficient

Chapter 35 - Toddler

Jamie's POV

I watch, mesmerised, as my twin manipulates her body on the ice. She glides with a grace I will never possess, from one side of the rink to the other. Pulling her leg up behind her and stretching it all the way up.

From there, she drops her leg and does a prep. One that I often see her practice at home all too much, before she leaps up, flying through the air as she turns more times than I can count.

There is a faint, scattered, applause from the rest of the audience, but I can only sit there, leaning forward with my breath caught in my throat. The more complex her routines continue to get, the more entranced I continue to become.

The way she moves seems completely effortless. Throughout the routine, I find myself wondering how she isn't dizzy.

The way she's so comfortable with whipping herself around more times than one can count, and still be able to move straight into her next skill is more than impressive.

But all too soon the routine is over, and Juliana is making her exit, the roar of the audience following behind her.

"That could be you." I snap my head in the direction of my oldest brother, who whispers this to me as the next skater starts preparing to take the ice.

"If only you worked half as hard as your sister, maybe you would finally have something to show for it."

The comment feels like he is sending a knife straight to my heart. I acknowledged a long time ago that I would never amount to even half of what Juliana does, I mean, the girl is well on track to be competing against olympics by the time she's fourteen.

I know for a fact that Juliana has continuously won gold in almost every division she's competed in at one point or another.

She's always been a fast learner, and I've always been the exact opposite. While she was learning to throw double salchows, I was still trying to figure out how to do a waltz jump.

As we got older, and competitions started getting more serious, it became abundantly clear that Juliana and I were nowhere near the same level.

I remember so many nights of begging Jameson to let me quit, but it was always to no avail.

Which is why I find it so unfair that he continues to ridicule me for not doing well in a sport I never asked to be in to begin with.

"One of these days." I hear Jensen reassure me from where he sits on the other side of me. "Just be patient." He rests his hand on my thigh and I lean into his arm, pretending to get sucked into the next skaters routine.

One of these days, I will prove that I can be just as good, if not better, than Juliana.

'And I did.' I think bitterly to myself as I set down the picture that was taken of Juliana and I at one of the very few competitions of hers I was allowed to attend.

It was a slow process, but eventually I found something I was good at. People pleasing.

Could I skate at an olympic level? No. Did I skip two grades and still graduate top of my class? No. However, I understand the art of manipulation to an impeccable degree.

I will admit, I've had some outbursts. When I first got here I was having a bit of emotional turmoil about my life being completely torn apart, but who wouldn't?

Now that I'm back in control, and with a clear head, I can go back to being the perfect child.

Jameson had always made it clear that he would accept nothing less than perfection. He wanted immediate obedience, impeccable manners, the knowledge of when to speak and when to stay quiet.