The Rapunzels ONC 2024

11: Flour

 Our parents are dead.

At least that's what I pretend when I stand over them poking them on the shoulder. They are asleep. So out of it, I could tap dance on their faces and they'd not notice.

Their deep slumber suits me well.

I know my sisters are in Lu's room cowering when I dash to the kitchen and then to the living room to grab the flour we use to bake and the flour my parents had been bowed over barely half an hour ago.

Back in Lulu's room, I create two lines of each kind of flour on an old sticker album that Lulu doesn't want to throw out for some stupid reason.

I'm fidgeting from nerves. I want to know what's going on. I want to know how much we;ve been lied to. I want to tear myself away and find my stranger. I want to know who he is. My thoughts are all over the place.

"Who first?" Lulu pulls me out of my thoughts.

I raise my hand and hunch over the baking flour. "Might as well." I take a deep breath and feel the ugly way it enters my nostrils. It feels like dust then all of a sudden like dough.

I grimace and look at my sisters. Lulu is about to have a go when I hold my hands up to ward her away. "Only me." My voice is someone's lost whisper.

Lulu winces and casts her gaze down. "You may make yourself ill," her voice is someone's whisper too.

Turning at Lexi, I see fear and relief dueling it out on her face.

"Do we wait?" Lu asks looking back up.

I shrug. I have no idea how this works so I suggest we wait ten minutes before I try the other flour.

My sisters nod and sit down; Lex at the desk and Lu next to me on the floor.

Silence is a blessing at times, a hell at others. Right now, I can't say anything in the Grimstone place is a blessing. Even I am damned.

My sisters are on edge. Lexi has taken some coloured pencils and is drawing. Lulu is humming to herself. None of us are looking at each other much yet when they do finally glance my way, I bet it's to see if I've turned into some kind of monster.

I count minutes. Then I count seconds. When ten minutes are up, I draw in a loud breath. "Ok, so this doesn't work." I reach for a tissue, blow my nose, and toss the wad of paper into the small yellow garbage can.

"Maybe the other kind doesn't either," Lexi moves away from her drawing to sit by us "We don't have to try it."

"We don't," I hunch over the book and utter carefully as not to disrupt the powder, "But I do." I take a breath, then another. In. Deep. Deeper. I inhale and the dust enters like nothing that's ever been inside me. As I lift my head, I hear angels. A whole fucking choir rushing towards me. My eyes are in outer space. Holy...

From the Earth below, Lulu and Lexi call me back. When I look around, I see every wolf that has long since gone extinct running around the galaxies.

In the back of my brain, a man's voice calls my name. He comes to me and places a gun in my hand, then he helps me lift my arms. "Kill them, Fia," his voice belongs to one of the singing angels. "Kill every damn wolf."

"Fia!" Lulu is pulling me down as if I were a balloon.

I draw my hands over my face. There's a smile someone's painted on. "This is..." I am breathless.

"What?" both sisters ask. Their eyes are animated.

I scramble up as they attempt to bring me back down. "The two flours aren't the same thing." I clasp my hands over my giggling mouth. I am happy. I am delirious! With each passing second I want to rip away from this family and find the source of this euphoria. "Cocaine isn't flour. It's...fuck...it's...wow."

"Are you alright?" Lulu rises and rushes to me.

"Yes," I nod. I keep nodding until Lu takes hold of my head and makes me stop. "I'm amazing."

My sisters look at me like I am insane. Lexi looks like she may faint. "We shouldn't have tried this." Her voice is pitiful.

Lulu agrees. "Bad, bad idea."

Lexi tiptoes to us. She's wringing her hands and shaking her head. "You need to lie down."

I grab my hair and pull. "No, I want to go outside." I laugh. "I want to run."

"Please stay," Lulu cries.

"I'm going to him," I say in a stage whisper. "You scaredy cats stay here."

I head for the door. The air around me is electric.

"Where are you going?" Lulu's voice is tiny. Minuscule. She's an ant. A flea.

"To my stranger, of course." I inhale and am out of the house. Before I can exhale, I am at the guesthouse.

A wolf is howling as I head towards him. He is still sleeping. He is silent. He is helpless.

He is mine.