Little Man

Chapter 1

She stepped through the door the blast of air hitting her in the face as her heels clacked on the tile floor. Her long walk to the principal's office began. She thought this was a walk she had put behind her. But no, now she was the adult waiting to hear what had happened, not the child waiting for mom and dad to arrive. With each step her stomach began to act as if it were at a gymnastic meet. She did not want to hear that her son was a "problem". She did not want to hear that he could not control his emotions. She did not want to hear that he did not sit still or follow directions. She wanted to someone to see him for him. She wanted someone to see his bright ideas and his smile. She wanted to see that he was three steps ahead of everyone else and sometimes the other things never made it on his radar. She turned the knob on the door. The secretary pasted a smile on her face and said "Ms. Blakely, Mrs. Thomas will see you in her office."

As I walked into the office I saw him sitting in a high back chair. It had a blue chevron pillow. I had to smile to myself. At least the pillow would give him a little movement. His legs were swinging. His shoulders were slumped in disappointment. He would not look at me. His body told me more than his words could have.

Mrs. Thomas pointed to the chair across from her desk as she stood. There was no smile on her face. "Mrs. Blakely." Her voice was stilted. "Thank you for coming so quickly."

"My son is important to me."

"As he should be. I already spoke briefly of some of the school's concerns from today. He got so upset that he picked up a chair and threw it. His teacher has informed me that he is in counseling to help with his anger but at this point today I do have to ask that you take him home for the day as well as an additional day tomorrow. This will go on his record as a 2 day suspension. The school understands that you are diligently working with him on his issues but it comes down to the safety of the other children in the classroom. I hope that you can understand."

"Yes, Mrs. Thomas I realize the liability of the school. Do you have any other recommendations outside of the current referrals that you have given me for counseling? I am looking more for a mentoring type program."

Mrs. Thomas smiled. The first of the day. She rose from her chair and approached her filing cabinet. "Mrs. Blakely, I have several National ones on this list, ones like Big Brother Big Sister. There are also scouting programs such as Boy Scouts and Trail Life but I feel that your young man might do best with this one."

She handed me two sheets of paper she had pulled from a drawer. The first was a list of many different organizations. The second was a flyer for an afterschool program. DIY.org Interesting.

"Thank you Mrs. Thomas. We will see you on Thursday."

I turned to B sitting in the chair. He lifted his head. Unshed tears in his eyes. I held my hand out to him. He picked his backpack off the ground and we walked out of the principal's office.

I could hear my little guys breaths keeping time with my heels as we walked to the car. I did not want to show emotion. I kept breathing. A modified movie line playing in my head: "Just keep breathing."

"Mom, I tried to be good. Really I did." The tears fell from his eyes. I bent down and wrapped my arms around my little man. I am failing him. I don't know what else to do. The shots, the medicine, the therapy, the sleep...What more before he has control? What more do we need to do before everyone understands that there is nothing really "Wrong" with my kid. How much more before others see what I see.

"Blythe Gabriel Blakley we will figure this out. Sometimes it only times time. We will figure it out."

I opened the door. Blythe scooted into his booster seat and buckled his seatbelt before I had walked around the car.