MUSINGS, REFLECTIONS, VOMIT AND THIS NASTY TAR RESIDUE A FORAY IT THE WORLD OF GONZO.....TRIP 1
Some people spend a nice weekend afternoon working in the garden or cleaning out the garage perhaps going for a hike and then settling down in the evening and relaxing thinking about what they did or looking over what they accomplished. These same people probably will go to bed early so they can make it to church or work in the morning, perhaps try to run a few errands before the game starts. I'm not one of those people, not that I dislike those people, sometimes I even envy those people. I'm just not one of those people. It was a nice day out today. I got up early with my wife, she left for work and I got to work. Now after a day of alternating between doing the stuff those other people do and taking time to prepare what I do I'm ready. After a day of mashing, soaking, waiting, evaporating, washing and repeating. I now get to look and admire my accomplishment. I now have a glassware baking dish with a black tar residue on the bottom. Okay, well it is not as nice as a perfectly manicured lawn. Actually it looks like someone cleaned their gutters and scooped some of that nasty water from the bottom of the gutter that is full of green slim and let it dry out, and but only after pouring some gasoline on it to make sure it smelled as bad as it looked. Gross and fowl smelling as it may be this is my reward, now I just have to figure out how I'm gonna eat this shit. I never aid it was a good idea but after a decade plus of stupid antics it's just another night.
Later....
LA-111 also called LSA a mild hallucinogen that is naturally occurring in some plant seeds and an ergot fungus. A precursor to it more famous (or is it infamous) cousin LSD-25. It also happens to be my adventure for the evening. I chose to do an extract from plant seeds and found some gel gaps that I was able to scrap the previously described tar into, thus making it possible to consume. Looking back on all that I should have just eating the fucking seeds, but then again sometimes one just gets caught up in the whole process just to make it feel like something was accomplished.
Now all I gotta do is hold it down and keep out the thoughts of how poisonous that solvent was that I used when making this.
LSA is very different from LSD, you don't get the tense body feeling with all the extra energy that normally comes from LSD. Also one tends to not have too many visuals though some effects can be see with your eyes closed. It is more of a drowsy feeling where you start to notice a strange and very fluid flow of your thoughts.
Oh yeah, and there is the waves of nausea.
I try to quietly make my way down the hall as not to wake or disturb my wife. It's my night off and my time so it's not like a fear of being caught that one has in their early adolescence, it just the last thing one needs as they are hunched over a toilet barfing their brains out hoping they didn't take too much, or even worse too little of some home made concoction is their significant other popping their head in and saying something like, "Well I can see you're busy and will be coming to bed latter!" Followed by a muttered "jackass" as they walk back to the bedroom to watch some dumb TV drama.
Ahh the purge, it seems like before your consciousness is opened you body must be punished. LSA, Peyote, and especially _Ayahuasca_ all have this curse that comes with them. Once one has made it thru or at least become accustomed to that wretched feeling they can usually relax, put on some music, close their eyes and see where their thoughts go. Summer is coming to an end and there is a light rain outside. I put on a light sweatshirt and wonder on to my back porch to sit in the dark and listen to the rain.
It seems so familiar as my thoughts wander in the dark and the sensation of the sound of the rain slowly washes over my body it feels as if the individual rain drops are hitting me causing waves of energy to slowly flow over my body massage me. Yet I remain dry sitting in my covered porch. The thoughts and sensations have become old friends even when there not so friendly. For about 13 years now I've been taking these voyages, wow 13 years. I remember those early years. The 90's were an odd time to grow up. In many ways we felt some sort of a connection to that late 60's early 70's time. We were coming out of the 80's a decade of excess. A time when even cocaine wasn't fast enough no we had to have our crack and wall St was riding high. It was all about low taxes, big spending and MTv. The 90's was a revolt against that in a way, just like the late 60's was a revolt against the uptight establishment based culture. They had rallied against the Vietnam war, we in the 90's got to see the fall of the Berlin Wall and the USSR. We had been raised to fear nuclear war and nuclear winter, told first about mutually assured destruction and then told it might be possible to win a nuclear war, after the fall of the USSR it seemed like that weight had been lifted off our shoulders. AIDS which had ended the sexual freedom of the 60's seemed a lot less scary then it was in the 80's. Now our love and sex movement was happening at all night raves and fueled by MDMA. Hell, even the movement to legalize pot was finally making some headway in the 90's. Well had Bill Clinton in the White House, finally someone young again and who actually had to use the dumb excuse "Well, I smoked pot, but I didn't inhale". Gas was cheap (at least by the time I was driving) and the government actually had a budget surplus. The youth had computers and was learning to use this new Internet thing. America was on top, things were looking good.
I'm not sure when it started to fall apart. I'm sure nobody would argue if you said that the 90's really ended on 9/11/01, but things were getting ugly before that. It seems like all the pot smoking, ecstasy eating, and conspicuous consumption was taking it's toll. Kids didn't feel like they need to go to college get a degree move out and start a life. They seemed to be just taking a class a semester forever and moved in to their parent's basements. We were spending more time in chatrooms and playing head to head video games then talking to real people. Everybody had a pager and then a cell phone but no longer had things to say. Our president was under investigation for some sort of shady real estate deal, that turned to a perjury and impeachment trial about his affair with an intern. Our leader had gone from "I didn't inhale" to "that depends on how you define the word is."
Then one morning on the TV we had to watch the footage coming from an affluent suburb in Columbine, Co. Kids crawling out of windows, teachers lying on the ground bleeding to death, terror by 2 high school students who wanted to die and take out as many people as they could on the way. Stocks went down, heroine use was up and then on Sept 11, 2001 it all finally came to an end.
I opened my eyes and looked around. The rain had stopped. I had been letting my thoughts wander for about 2 hours. I poured myself a tall glass of scotch and drank it down. Then slowly made my way to bed. I drifted off to sleep wondering what went wrong how did we let the American dream get water down and flushed away, but most importantly why did that shit have too look and smell so gross, there has to be a better way then scraping black tar extracted from seeds with carcinogenic solvents to enjoy a good trip.
