Blurred Ambition
Chapter 1 - Peter
I dropped a slice of pizza into my lap as I heard the key in the door. David's girlfriend was home, bringing all the joy of a downpour at a barbeque.
She sat beside me, eyeing my food until I eventually offered her the piece of pizza I had peeled from my lap and positioned back in the box. Natalie rolled it up into a tight sausage roll-shaped package and in two bites it was gone. I savoured the precious moments of chewing before I would have to endure the story of her day. My quiet time was cruelly cut short as Natalie began to talk and spit small pieces of food at the same time. I moved the remaining pizza out of the way of the falling debris and sat back with what I hoped was a look of genuine interest on my face.
"Sooo busy today. My ears are ringing and my eyes are stinging. I'm a poet and I don't even know it!"
At this point, Natalie actually waits for me to laugh at her desperate lunge in the vague direction of humour. I try to remain strong, but eventually crack, pointing at her as if I have just caught the comedy curveball on the boundary then emitting a burst of gentle laughter mostly through my nose. Delighted, she continues...
"I scanned 400 documents, sorted 600 and indexed nearly 1800 today. Pete, I'm sorry, I probably haven't even explained what I do. You're so easy to talk to I feel like I've known you for ages and I forget we hardly know each other. I mean, how long have we known each other?"
"It feels like a long time to me, certainly," I smile.
"Yes, it does, how long is it?"
I wonder at this point if at the end of my life I will walk through the gates of Hell and the Devil will sit me down next to Natalie to discuss the exact length of our relationship. Meanwhile, people being stretched on racks and roasted over open fires will be counting their demonic blessings and chuckling.
"Three months and two days," I reply, "David knows the hours and minutes but I don't follow them quite so closely."
David is utterly besotted with Natalie. He believes that she is the sexual equivalent of a Kebab and chilli sauce on the way home from a big night out. As I watch her take another piece of pizza I take an unplanned leap of thought and briefly wonder if her never-ending hunger translates to the bedroom.
Natalie tears into another lost triangle of meat feast with extra cheese, then tells me how sweet David is. Although this lasts for three or four minutes, I can feel myself physically getting older by at least an hour.
"What's the video? Do you mind if I watch it with you?" asks Natalie, breaking out of her David tribute and catching me by surprise.
"No, of course not. I mean, it's 'The Matrix Reloaded', you've probably seen it. Everyone has apart from me."
"Cool! I love that film!"
I weigh up in my mind what would bring me the most pain; having to watch Matrix Reloaded with Natalie or the possibility of the conversation going on all night and her remembering that she was going to explain exactly what her job is with the Halifax. To give myself breathing space, I smile in celebration with Natalie that she likes the film then go to the fridge to open a can of cold, magnificent Stella Artois.
"Could you grab me the half bottle of wine that's in the fridge from last night? Ta."
On my way back to the settee I realise that I have suddenly become involved in a wine, pizza and video evening with my flatmate's girlfriend. This would be all wrong and far too cosy if I actually had any feelings for Natalie, but I feel safe in the knowledge that she is not in my present 'top 500 favourite girls' list.
