Daughter 4254

Chapter 7

With the History of Nature reader as a companion, my cell had become a more tolerable place. It was still not comfortable or warm, but at least I had something to take my mind away from the future and the past. I practically memorized it the first time I owned it. Now I knew I had it, word for word, lodged in my brain. Even if it was confiscated, I could see it and recite it for anyone who cared to hear.

 It still triggered memories for me, like the first time I saw the song bird. There were numerous questions on The Tests from this particular reader. I thought back to that morning: the triumph I had felt as I skipped through each question, confident of the answers. It was nothing compared to the feeling that arrived with my letter.

 I had been good for a whole week. I held my tongue and kept to my schedule. An instructor even commended me for my efforts to comply; she only hoped they weren’t too little too late. I kept thinking that I didn’t want to give them anything else to stack against me.

The assignments came for my brother and me on the same day. Important information packets such as these were hand delivered at night when family bonding time had begun. I often wondered when the post workers bonded with their families, but not tonight. I was finally holding the crisp white envelope in my hand, thick papers folded inside, spelling out the rest of my life.

 My brother held no ceremony. He took his envelope without even thanking the carrier and peeled back the flap, removing the contents with steady hands. He was confident. He spent the previous twelve months completely immersed in his studies. It had been a relief. He was so busy proving himself that there had been no time for him to keep up with my mistakes.

 He began to read aloud, skipping the formalities and jumping right into the assignment. “You are hereby called to report to the Office of Logistical Training and Overseers on the fifth day of the ninth month in this year of our land 2134.” He smiled like I hadn’t seen him smile in years. “I’ve done it!” He continued reading through the paperwork and sat down at the table, oblivious to my father’s congratulations.

 “Well done, Son. You’ve worked hard and earned this. Well done.” My father had never been a very animated or outgoing person, but since our mother’s final rest, he had withdrawn even further into himself. He was there, present in body and actions, fulfilling every obligation to the community and his children, but his mind and heart had left us, gone to the Field of Yesterday with our mother. I watched him for a moment as he said these words without feeling and then I turned to my own letter.

 I carefully peeled back the opening and slid out the thick bundle of papers. A slight moment of dread passed through me as I imagined my packet containing maps of the sewers and directions for obtaining a uniform. I shook it off and opened to the title page.

             Citizen 699-3244-4254, you are to be commended for your efforts on The Entrance Examinations for Secondary Education and are hereby awarded the level ofOutstanding Academic Achievement in the areas of Math, Science, History, andComposition.However, upon review of your citizenship records and taking into account the fact of your birth to family 3244 in the community 699, you are not technicallyeligible for entrance into The Secondary School of Community 713.

            A committee was called to review your case and has chosen to allow you entrance to The Secondary School under the label of Probationary Appointment due to your outstanding academic achievements.

We believe that with time and discipline you will be a fine contributor to our society and we urge you to pay strict heed to the rules and regulations in all actions and deeds. The first infraction will result in expulsion and reassignment.

            Yours in Community and Usefulness,

            Professor 1248

            Head Leader

            The Secondary School of Community 713

After a few moments of disbelief, I sucked in a very large gulp of air as the letter was snatched from my hand. I looked up to see my brother smirking at me from behind my precious news.

 “So what’s it going to be? Produce Crew? Sewage Overseer? Junior Sewage Overseer? Floor sanitizer at The Shop?” He stepped back as I jumped to grab the letter from him

 “Give that back.” I wasn’t in any mood to deal with him. In fact, I’d rather not have discussed this with either of them at all. I was just beginning to imagine slowly slipping out the door with my triumph when he snatched the happy news away. I knew my brother would be enraged when he realized what he was holding.

 He looked over the official document quickly, darting and turning as I struggled to retrieve it from him. Suddenly he stopped and I snatched it back.

 “That’s enough.” My father turned in his chair and looked at us with impatience. His voice was firm and we both froze.

 “It must be a mistake!” My brother was the first to speak. “Look at that, Father!” He pointed to my letter. “Look! It can’t be correct.”

 “Let me see it, 4254.” My father held out his hands, taking my papers. He glanced through the lines while we waited, finally saying, “When did you apply?”

 “Eleven days ago.”

 “This is ridiculous, Father! She’s a disgrace! How can they let her into the Secondary School?” My brother was seething. He let the news of my success completely overcast his joy at accomplishing his life’s ambition. It was a good marker for just how deeply he disliked me. No, I was fairly sure now that he hated me.

 Father held up his hand to silence my brother and looked up slowly to face us both, something I can’t remember him doing ever.

 “It is not useful to lose your temper. This is, in fact, what might be called a miracle.” Seeing our confused looks, he shifted his gaze back to my letter and explained, “That is an old word from the lost days meaning that something that should have been impossible has happened. Apparently the Secondary School Committee sees enough value in our 4254 to salvage her from the fields despite her citizenship records.”

 “But it is NOT logical!”

 My father held up his hand again. “You are too upset. Go to your quarters, 4253, until you can control your outbursts. Spend ten minutes in your sensory chamber, then read your own papers again and focus on your path in life. Never mind those around you.”

 4253 stomped to the table and scraped up his packet before storming to his room. I was left alone and uncomfortable in front of my father. I stared at the table and waited for him to speak again. He glanced through the other pages, pausing here and there, then finally set them down and looked at his hands.

 “I will miss you, my daughter.” It was a simple, quiet phrase. It struck the very center of my heart, melding with the hopes of my mother and all of the other precious things I kept there.

 I looked at his face and saw sadness where no emotions had rested in weeks. I stepped forward and touched his shoulder. He looked up at me for a moment. I wondered what he saw. But it was just a moment and then he handed me my papers and turned back to the table where he took another bite of his food. My brother’s plate sat untouched and I was sure I couldn’t eat at a moment like this.