Pierrot

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"I'm taking my giant red ball to practice my new performance."

That's what I always say whenever someone asked me what am I going to do up in a hill. It is partially true that I need to practice for my next performance, but not my full intention. Because above the hill where a giant Willow tree stood proudly, is where she cries all by herself.

She is not what you think she is. She is not my girlfriend. She just thinks of me as her brother; someone she can talk to when she has problems or someone she can rely on. I don't care what others think about me, as long as she is happy I'm already contented.

As I climb up the hill, as always, I saw her crying below the Willow tree again. Whenever she looks sad, I also felt that a part of me is sad too. And as always, at a times like this, I always attempt to cheer her up by using magic tricks.

Every time I make a small trick, she awards me with a smile on her face. And her smile is already a blessing for a small-time Pierrot like me.

We always talk about random things above the hill. It's like our secret meeting place where we can express our own thoughts and ideas. But I know for a fact that my feelings won't reach her, for I am just a Pierrot while she is the daughter of our Boss.

She made a sad expression as she shares to me her problem; "Father Set-up an arranged marriage for me. I hate him for doing that but what else can I do? The circus can't perform any longer if we don't have funds... So father agreed to a proposal from a rich gentleman."

I listen to her and smiles at her as always. Every time that she was about to cry, I always wipe her tears away by expressing myself in a funny way. This feeling that I'm holding, I know this is the right choice, for I understand very well where I should place myself here.

"What are you both doing there, idling?! Go back to work and distribute the flyers in the town!!"

We run away as we both getting scolded by the ring master. Trying not to stop, we both laughed like children who are playing hide and seek.

She always grabs my hand and leads me to a center of a town's square. I looked at the perimeter and saw all the people passing by. This is our daily job as travelling performers. We need to attract audience to watch our night show.

I took a deep breath and starts performing in the middle of the crowd.

Everyone's eyes turn to where I am standing. I got nervous but it never stops me to perform. I love to make people smile. Being a Pierrot does match my character after all.

She quietly watches me from the audience's view while distributing the flyers. As I give my best to everyone's attention, a pat from her shoulder made her look sad again. I tried to check who it was and then I saw a guy wearing a formal attire. It then struck me that maybe he is the one she is talking about. All I can see was her sad face as she follows the guy who keeps giving her a signal to leave the crowd.

I can't do anything.

This is for the best.

All I can do is to give my best too.

For the sake of the place I considered as home, which is the Circus.

As I tried to turn my mood back to happiness, I was already facing the ground.

Yes, before I knew it, I slipped from the giant ball I was standing before. It took me a while to realize the situation. Everyone was shock to see me not moving an inch on the floor. As I saw a small pointed rock beside me that's when I realized what happened to me.

I tried to stand up but the wound from my forehead made me feel dizzy. And then I saw her reaction, so shock that she suddenly tries to come and help me.

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