Never Have I Ever (One Last Time # 1) (Wattys2017)

Epilogue

"Hey, Abel."

I sat down in the dirt, pushing my hair out of my eyes so I could see every rose I had left on the grave stone for the last year and a half. I had made sure to buy most of them fake, so they wouldn't wilt and die, but a few of them had been real. Like the one from the day James was born.

"I know it's been a little while since I came out here, but James couldn't leave the house until he was at least three months old. And I couldn't come here without bringing him." I looked up, meeting Jeremy's eyes as he pushed up the blanket on the stroller and picked up my son.

It still seized to amaze me how much Jeremy had grown over the last year and a half. It hadn't been sudden, his growth spurt, but it had been quick enough where I was still caught by surprise. He was already almost as tall as Abel, who had been a little over six foot, so I could only imagine how much more he was going to grow.

"Here." Jeremy crouched down and laid the baby in my arms, bowing his head as he walked away with his hands shoved into his pockets. I felt James wrap his small hand around my finger, a whimpering sound threatening to leave his mouth.

"This is James Abel Hendricks." I said, brushing my hand against my baby's soft, rosy cheek. "He was born April 8th." I shifted him in my arms a little, fixing his onesie.

"It was funny, because I never found out the sex and I was still going to have your name in his or hers. If the baby had been a girl, I would have named her Gabrielle. Because your name is still in it." I laughed quietly, trying to stop myself from crying.

"He was born perfectly healthy, perfect. And I know you were there, Abe. I know you made sure he was." I grabbed James' bottle from the stroller and shook it a little.

"I was going to tell you that last night we were together. I was going to say it, I promise. But I. . . I got scared. I didn't know how you were going to react right then and I. . . I thought I'd have more time." I pushed my hair out of my eyes with my hand quickly, "I'm just surprised you couldn't tell. I was already two months pregnant at the time. I had already started to get the bump." I brushed my thumb along the back of my sons head as Jeremy sent me a smile from across the cemetery.

"And it took a year and a half, but I finished the list." I sat James up so he was leaning against my stomach, my arm wrapped securely around him as I took The List from the baby bag.

"Most of them I completed within the last couple months. Charlie helped me." I said with a quiet laugh, "You really are a sneaky bastard, Abel. I didn't think. . . I doubted I'd ever see him again after Vegas. But you called him, you explained what you could. But when he showed up a few days after the funeral, he didn't expect me to be pregnant. No one did. The only person who knew was Le." I set the list on the ground in front of me.

"Riding a motorcycle wasn't all that fun though. It actually scared the crap out of me." I looked at all the highlighted things on the list, smiling through my slightly blurred vision.

"I played Hide and Seek in IKEA with Jeremy. It was actually really fun, but they eventually kicked us out. We're not allowed back at the one for at least six months. But it was worth it." I whispered, laughing. James squirmed a little in my arms before opening his eyes, making my next words die on my tongue.

His eyes were a beautiful Emerald green, the exact same color as Abel's. I had been beyond shocked when he had opened his eyes for the first time, I had freaked out, then sat and cried for a good hour. But now, now all it did was take my breath away. We had made this baby, Abel and me. It made me smile every time I thought about it.