Love on the Scale

Chapter Forty-Six

I maneuvered through the crowd of well-dressed men and women, trying to find Brandi and Macyn. We'd been separated when I went to the bathroom. I had no idea where to go next.

Clouds of perfume and cologne threatened to make me sneeze, but I shook off the feeling and kept moving. Then I stopped. It was stupid, walking around blind. I pulled out my cell. Before I could call Brandi, hand brushed my bare back. I jumped, and looked up as Derek circled in front of me. His eyes met mine, and his frown disappeared.

"Well well WELL! I was sure I had the wrong woman, but no, it's you. What..." he didn't finish, but grabbed my hand and turned me in a slow circle. "That dress... is the sexiest thing I've ever seen you wear. You look... what the heck did you do? Did you make this?"

I nodded, tucked some hair behind my ear. "I um, yeah. I thought you weren't coming?"

"I wasn't, like I said. But yesterday my wife changed her mind and bought a dress for the occasion so... here I am... I'm sorry I don't know what else to say besides you look exquisite."

I thanked him, and he left to find his wife. His reaction had been no different from anyone else that knew me. The dress design I'd kept on the down-low until an hour before we left, when I changed and did my hair and makeup. I went all out for the first time, as I knew I probably wouldn't wear that much makeup ever again. After all their buildup and fussing over how I wouldn't let them see the dress, James, Brandi and Macyn didn't react when I first emerged.

The dress was unlike anything I'd ever worn before. The color of rubies, material was metallic, soft, shimmery, and clingy. It hugged my curves instead of hiding them, then flowed all the way to the floor in a straight wave, with the wide neckline right under my collarbones. It looked plain, until I moved, and the expanse of my back showed.

After a few days of Derek's assignment, I discovered that the rolls of fat that had existed on my sides were gone. My back was smooth, and I loved it most of all. So I had to create the deep scoop of the dress, which ended a few inches above my behind.

For the first time, I'd wanted to show off. I wanted the world's eyes to be drawn to me, for people to wonder who I was. And I'd gotten my wish. I couldn't could the number of people who had approached me before the show, and the stares I'd gotten even throughout it.

My eyes had watched all the models that came out, but I lingered the longest on Neil, when he got his turns. I had seen him in the studio, and he'd always had a dark, sexy sensuality, but on the runway it was taken to an insane level. Multiple times I'd wished, hoped, that he would look down at the side of the stage and spot me, smile at me, but of course he was focused on his job. Brandi nudged my side every time he'd come out, and I'd just grin without answering, unable to take my eyes off of him.

I wished I could still call him mine. I wished his dark looks belonged to me alone. I wanted him back. But it was too late, I knew that. Far too late. Someone else had the exclusive right to touch his hair, his face, everything. I hoped he was happy. I knew I was, even if I was by myself. I'd learned to love myself, all of myself; I was no longer ashamed.

My phone rang, and I slipped it from my black clutch, pressed against the wall so I wouldn't disrupt the flow of human traffic. "Hello?"

"Hey, come backstage. I'm getting all this makeup off, but Brandi and Macyn are back here. So is Macyn's uh, friend."

I smiled. Macyn was flustered around Sean, the man she'd met, much like I'd been upon meeting Neil. It was adorable; I hoped they would find happiness together. I hung up after agreeing to come back, and again started through the flow of bodies.

Backstage, James sat in a chair while a woman scrubbed makeup from his face, and Brandi stood next to him, sipping a soda. His eyes lit up when he saw me. "Hey!"

Macyn and her man were nowhere in sight, and I questioned them about her. James grinned. "They left. He took her out for ice cream. So how'd I do?"

"Great."

"You should have been the one up there. I still can't believe how amazing you look."

I smiled, and breathed a large, happy sigh. It had been a great night. Upon another breath, I caught a whiff of something familiar. I couldn't place it, but I knew I'd smelled it before. Where was it coming from...

I turned, and bumped into someone. "Excuse me, I'm sorry."

"I would say the same... but I'd be lying."

My eyes flicked up to a sapphire pair, watched them filled with a fire I'd never seen. Neil looked me over from my head to me feet and back to my eyes, taking his time, and his lips stretched into a grin when I didn't look away, but I held my ground, though my heart threatened to jump out and run to him. Even when he leaned down, I kept my eyes fixed on his, all innocence, and his hand started to lift, only to lower again. The briefest flash of uncertainty flashed through his eyes, to be replaced by his previous heat.

"Surprised, and astounded, yes. But no... I'm not sorry one bit."