17 | uninvited

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Jitters have danced through my body since I woke up this morning

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Jitters have danced through my body since I woke up this morning. The second I hit send on my last email of the day, I hopped off of Chace's spare work computer and drove straight to my apartment to gather some things I left behind. Fake I.D., cash, and a pair of boots for walking. Do I trust Tyler entirely yet? No. Do I think he's capable of having a good time? From the moment I met him. Besides Chace, the past several months have been slow, like a dripping faucet waiting for me to turn the pressure on full blast. Tonight is about adventure. Tyler has been hinting about his exciting lifestyle for long enough. Now he can prove it.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

I freeze just short of opening the door. Who could that be? Chace planned on staying at work late tonight. Maybe he stopped by for lunch in case we don't get to see each other? I rest my palm on the doorknob. But he would have called or texted me first. Dropping my hand, I back away slowly.

Knock! Knock!

The walls of my throat tighten. Swallowing is near painful. My heart beats on my ribcage while my body becomes disoriented. Why can't Victoria be here with me? What if it's him? What if he's finally found me? Tears well up in my eyes and I press my fists against my temples. "Fuck. What do I do?" I hiss. My arms and legs shake as I stagger back. Every possible scenario races through my mind, but I can't imagine who could possibly be at the door.

Tyler? Could text me. Victoria? She has a key and would call if she lost it. Chace? He doesn't know I'm here and would have called me before showing up. David? He'd stalk me in silence and show up when I'm alone.

Stop. You're being dramatic. I close my eyes and beg my heart to stop beating so damn fast. I can't hear over it. You're having a panic attack. I look at my hands shaking to confirm my fears. I try to control my breathing, but that only makes it harder to do. Opening my mouth, I begin gasping for air as if that'll help. Calm down. Rationalize your situation. The only way he'd be able to find my new address is if my parents gave it to him. They would never.

Knock. Knock.

I jump and stare at the door again. Why don't they just go away? Desperately, I pull out my phone. I didn't accidentally silence it. No one's messaged me besides Chace telling me to be careful tonight. Swallowing the large lump in my throat, I go to the group chat I have with my parents. My heart drops.

Six months.

That's how long it's been since we've talked.

11/25 - ○Mama: Hola. It's been a while honey. Are you okay?

12/1 -Papa: Your mother and I miss you very much. We hope you're doing well.

12/25 - M: I know you must still be upset. Victoria keeps us updated. She says you're doing better and you're happier than ever. Hope you will talk to us soon.

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