How I Met Your Father

Chapter 3

"And so began Year 3. Ron and Hermione were back together and things looked wonderful, for a while. And then, all hell broke loose. You see, none of us had anticipated the sheer magnitude of the challenge we were about to face. All things considered, it would be our greatest one yet..."

~*~*~*~*~YEAR 3~*~*~*~*~

"I quit!" Hermione shrilled as she slammed the crumpled piece of parchment on the table, making all of them jump. Her hair was a frazzled mess and her eyes were scanning the papers with crazed urgency again, looking for the elusive solution. "I've tried every combination in existence," she hissed, angrily batting a stray strand of hair out of her face. "This is impossible!"

"We can't give up," Ron said firmly, peering over her shoulder. "We'll beat this, Mione. We have to!"

"But Ron, look at it!" she practically wailed, shoving the parchment at him. "The seating arrangements just don't add up. According to our latest plan, my parents are sitting with your Aunt Muriel, your parents are with the singles and Charlie is expected to be at three tables at the same time!"

Ron snorted. "If they're the bridesmaids' tables, he'll find a way."

Blaise's attention snapped and he abandoned the envelopes he was addressing. "There are bridesmaids' tables at your wedding?" he demanded. "Why wasn't I informed?"

"Oh my, what an awful oversight," Hermione drawled, turning back to her notes. "Keep writing those invitations out. Do not stop. Harry, how are you doing over there?"

"Almost done," Harry replied, stuffing the last of his invitations in their requisite envelopes. "Hey Mione, I have a question."

"Shoot."

"Why am I on the Wedding Committee?"

Hermione huffed and abandoned her charts. "Because we need all the help we can get," she told him. "Ever since Ron's mum decided to add a 'few extra names' to our guest list..."

Come on," Ron whined. "I can't not invite my cousins."

"This is two hundred more people!"

"Two hundred 'more' people?" Blaise repeated blankly. His gaze swivelled back to the invitations and his expression crumpled to one of abject misery.

Hermione turned to him with a harried nod. "And that's not including my cousins from Australia, my other cousins from Kent, almost everyone from Hogwarts…"

Harry's head swam a bit as the list went on and on. "I thought you wanted a small intimate wedding," he pointed out.

Hermione trailed off and exchanged a knowing look with Ron. He sighed and nodded, as if answering a silent question. They did that all the time. It was very unsettling.

"Harry, I think it's time you learn the truth about the wedding fairy," Ron announced solemnly. "She doesn't exist."

Harry rolled his eyes and lobbed a cushion at him, which Hermione deftly caught. "What he means," she explained patiently, "is that the wedding you end up with is never the one you planned for. Take us, for example. We wanted a simple evening ceremony under the stars, with just our friends and family. And what do we have?"

"An afternoon at the Burrow, over six hundred guests, a chocolate fountain and my Uncle Octavius playing the bagpipes," Ron recited obligingly.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I rest my case. So, can everyone please just get these invitations done? We can go down to the Post Office tomorrow and owl them. I still need Ginny to help me pick out a dress." She blinked and looked around as if just realising something. "By the way, where is Ginny? She was supposed to be here hours ago to help out with this stuff."