i wake up about 5 hours later it's about 12am. dean is still on top of me, passed out. i tap him a bit and whisper "dean, get up, i gotta use the bathroom." he moans and groans. i tap him again and say "baby, please get up. i gotta pee." he rolls over and lays on his back beside me. he rubs his eyes then yawns. i stand and but then he immediately sits up and says "where are you going?" i look at him and say "i said i have to use the bathroom." he scootchs toward me and says "not alone. i can't have you get hurt again. i'm coming with, i'll sit outside of the bathroom, i wanna be close." i smile a bit then say "fine." i grab his hand and i pull his limp,tired, body out of bed.
we make it to the bathroom and he stands against the wall then slides down to the floor and sits. he looks up at me and says "do your thing. i'll be here." i walk into the bathroom and i do my thing. i'm in there for maybe 2 minutes, after i'm done washing my hands i slowly open the door. i look down at him and his head is in between his knees. i whisper "dean." no response. i go and crouch in from of him, i lift up his head just a little bit and his eyes are closed. i gently shake him and say "dean. babes. wake up, let's go back to bed." he lifts up his head and leans it against the wall. i wrap his arm around my neck and lift him. he slowly wakes up more as i do so. he looks over at me and smiles. i then look at him and say "i'm all good. now let's go to bed." i sit him on the bed. he lays down, i then crawl on top of him, i hide my face in his neck and i rest 1 hand on his cheek. he wraps his arms around me and kisses my head. i then kiss his neck a couple times, then i slowly close my eyes as they get heavier.
————————the next morning———————
i wake up, it's about 8am. dean is laying beside me, almost wide awake. when he sees me open my eyes he says "good morning my love.😌" he leans down and kisses my forehead. i then roll over and rest my head on his lap. he starts playing with my hair then says "you hungry??" i nod my head against his leg so he says "okay beautiful. let's go get some breakfast." i lift up my head and we both roll out of bed, he grabs my hand but as he tried to he hits my stitches and i flint in pain. he pulls his hand away and says "i'm so sorry bebe.🥺 i didn't mean to." i grab his hand and say "no,no,no. it's okay🥺it only hurts a little. i'm fine" he smiles a bit then starts walking. before we get to the kitchen i smell bacon. i look at dean and we both say "BACON!" with big smiles on our face. we jog the rest of the way to the kitchen and as we enter we see sam cooking. i walk in further and sam looks up from the pan. his eyes widen and his face soften. tears are brought to his eyes. we immediately walk toward each other and he wraps his big arms around me and as soon as he pulls away a tear rolls down his cheek as he says "thank god. how are you doing??" i wipe the tear from his cheek and say "i'm okay sammy. really." i then wrap my arms around him once more. he kisses the top of my head. we both pull away and i immediately walk over to the plate of bacon.
i take 3 pieces and i start shoving my face. dean looks at sam and says "really? she can call you sammy but whenever i call you sammy you make a big stink about it?cause apparently sammy is a chubby 12 year old..." sam chuckles then says "she could have died. she has an excuse. your you and i don't like when you say it." i laugh as i watch the boys argue over this. i then say "will both of you shut up😂" sam and dean both chuckles a bit. dean walks over to the food and says "how much do you want?" i laugh and say "i can get my own food.." he then looks back at me to say "nope. i'm getting it. how much you want?" i roll my eyes with a smile on my face and say "a little bit of everything." so he grabs a plate he puts a scoop of eggs,2 pancakes,and 4 pieces of bacon on my plate. he walks over to me and sets it in front of me as he says "eat up darling." i give him a quick kiss before he walks away. sam is starring at me with the little but sweet smile on his face. i look over at him and smile, hiding the food in my cheeks, making me look like a squirrel. that makes him and i let out a loud laugh. dean looks back at us and says "what? did i miss something?" i then look at dean and smile the way i did before which makes sam and i laugh again. dean chuckles a bit and whispers under his breathe "children."
dean grabs his plate and sits right beside me. we both eat at an alarming rate. i look up at sam and say "you gonna eat? or are you just gonna gaze at our food?" he giggles a bit and says " i don't wanna eat just in case y'all want more." i look at my plate then back up at him and say "just give us the plate of bacon, that's all we'll want." so sam slides the bacon to us and fixes up his plate. he sits beside me and starts eating. dean and i finish our food and immediately start shoving our face with bacon. sam looks at us in disgust and says "how can you guys shove your face with that? it's just so greasy and fatty. you guys have to watch your cholesterol." dean and i look at each other and i say with my mouth full "you always gotta have bacon in the meat mans kitchen. it's just so good." dean the looks at me and smiles cause i called him the meat man. dean then says "and we are watching our cholesterol. watching it go-" we both say "UP" in sync. sam rolls his eyes and says "please don't call dean the meat man. he wants to be called that and it's just weird." me and dean both start laughing. all 3 of us finish all of our food, i stand up bit dean stops me he says "here i got it. sit back down." i pull my plate away and said "i cut my wrists not broke my legs. i can put my plate by the sink. stop treating me like a child dean." dean is silent. i turn around and put my plate by the sink. i then walk out of the kitchen. i go sit in the library and about 5 minutes later sam finds me.
he sits down beside me and says "hey can we talk?🙂" i clear my throat and say "yeah,yeah of course." he looks at me with his puppy dog eyes and before he can say something i say "sammy. if this is about what i did, i am so beyond sorry. i know i made a mistake and i don't know what to do with myself because i know i scared and hurt both of you. i don't want death. i thought i did but i don't. i haven't told dean this yet but while i was unconscious i saw my future, my better life. and i want it. i love both of you too damn much to ever think about death again." sam rests his hand on my knee and says "i'm so happy that your fine. just please don't ever do it again you have a purpose to live. you just have to keep fighting. we love you more than you think. what was your better life?"
i take a deep breathe and say "we had somewhat stopped hunting, we'd only go on a hunt if it was close. dean and i were married, we had 2 beautiful kids. 1 boy 1 girl. the boys name was zeppelin and the girls name was charlie. the boy was 6 the girl was 4. you were still living with us, you'd let the kids climb all over you and they'd refer to you as unca giant. cas would come by every other day and they called him uncle cas. we're a true family. it was beautiful sam. i want that life." a smile is brought to sams face he says "i want that life too. so please promise you won't try anything bad ever again..." a tear rolls down my cheek and i say "i promise little brother." we both stand up and he pulls me into a tight hug and whispers "i love you y/n. i don't want to see you hurt ever again." i clench the back of his shirt with my hands and say "i love you too sam."
