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The late is because my laptop was giving me some trouble

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The late is because my laptop was giving me some trouble.

Also 450 comments and I'll update tomorrow?

━━━━━━━━━♚━━━━━━━━━

Katrina Diaz

"I've no excuse to give you for what I did, except for the fact that I was confused and lost. Hearing about our past from Vanessa made me angry, and despite all my trust in you, a cowardly part of me was scared that you would wake up one day and realise I am living because Diana — the mother of your child and your child paid a price. And for the longest, I told myself that you hate me. Seeing what you did to Kendra, I was scared because you have brains, guns, and power. You have everything I don't and the imbalance was scary..." I drawled.

He gave me a look that said 'how is any of that my mistake?'

"My mom, my sister, my best friend, my ex — they were not always cruel to me. They just changed mid-way. And an insecure part of me always believed you'd change, too. I let my cynical mind weave tales, and I had to protect myself because betrayal from you is not something I can ever recover from. So, I wanted to stay away from you, but then Gladys..." I sucked in a sharp breath to calm the panic raising in my chest.

"After what she did, it felt like it was me against the world; I just couldn't push past the hurt from her betrayal to see that anyone would truly care about me. One day she was giving me a cup of hot chocolate and the next day she was killing me. Despite never harming any of them, they all hated me, and how could you not when I caused you pain? So I assumed you were there to torture me as she had. And I didn't know if I wanted to live or die." I bit my lip. "I just..." didn't want to be tortured.

"It took me a while to remember how you're the reason I had survived Gladys physically and mentally. You have to know I'm not giving you reasons to justify my actions. I'm baring myself open to you, admitting I've been nothing but an insecure idiot." My heart stung. "And you have to know— You have to know how sorry I am. For threatening you. For not trusting you. For the way, I left things between us."

"There is an 'us'?" Cold, cold words.

"There..." My words died. "I'm sorry. I should have known that you wouldn't hurt me. I should have trusted you."

"But you never do." He ambled closer to my bed. "I could burn the world to keep you warm and you would find a way to make me the villain in your narration."

"I'm sorry..." I fisted the bedsheet.

His shoulders stiffened. "I heard you the first time."

"And people in your court don't get a second chance?" My eyes met his.

"Not you."

"I feel so special," I quipped, unable to push down the satire.

"You're not."

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