Farmer Abe

@AverageAkagiEnjoyer 
            
            Adam (Me) x Weiss: The one true pairing for us, honestly. What better way to show how far the two of us have come than for a Schnee to marry a Faunus, and vice versa? Also, I've always had a thing for short stacks...
            
            Blake x Jaune: I men, it's all right. Jaune works decently with pretty much any character in RWBY. I do think there are better matches for both of them, though.
            
            Roman x Neo: I never really got a sense of romance between these two. They have a close bond, but its more familial, in my opinion. Also, I'm pretty sure Roman's one and only love will be money, and Neo chaos.
            
            Emerald x Mercury: I can't see this one working out. Emerald is desperate for love, but Mercury just doesn't know how to love people thanks to his upbringing. I honestly don't know who I feel worse for.

@farmerabe 
            Adam X Weiss (kinda reminds me of Vegeta and Bulma, Angry bastard X Rich Bastard)
            Blake X Jaune
            Roman X Neo
            Emerald X Mercury

@Bakugan5988 
            
            Jaune x Ruby: The one true pairing for each other. Jaune is an acceptable boyfriend for most of the girls in RWBY, but Ruby herself is one of the few relationships where it really works. Sometimes a doofus is just made for a ditz, you know?
            
            Qrow x Summer: I can see it, and I like it. Ruby takes after her uncle so much that he might as well be her father anyway. Besides, losing the love of your life (especially if your own Semblance is what killed her) would certainly give a reason for Qrow's drinking problem.
            
            Sun x Blake: See my response to PhantomAlorNass.
            
            Jaune x Yang: I don't mind this pairing. Yang likes to take charge in a relationship, and Jaune is one of the few characters who would let her. Still, I think they could both find better significant others for themselves.

@farmerabe I am imagining him having the left arm be fitted with some form of heavy-duty propulsion and repulsion tech, kinda like how the Walloper from Secret Agent Clank operates.
            
            The kinetic energy of the weapon's charge makes its user dash forward in a lunging punch that knocks away anything hit VERY FAR. Also the charge is not expended until contact is made with an object, terrain or an enemy - so it's spammable (provided you have the Lightning Speed Mod; a Weapon Mod that speeds up the Walloper strike, while reducing windup time. The user also travels much farther in addition to the aforementioned upgrades.) to quickly traverse places in bursts of speed.

@farmerabe Gauss rifle, charged laser beam, flamethrower or slug thrower/shotgun for close encounters.

@farmerabe 
            Maybe two boys and a girl? 
            As for who knocks, Walter White…
            
            
            
            Kidding! I’d say either Winter or Illia, maybe Blake. As for why…
            Jacques stages a coupe in Atlas and it’s now an anarcho-capitalist state run by the SDC.

@ farmerabe  Boy and girl. Mercury Black would knock.

@farmerabe I'm thinking a boy and a girl

@farmerabe 
            Adam: I got you this necklace Weiss!
            Weiss: It’s beautiful! Where in the world did you find this?
            Adam: Well…
            *Sirens wail in the background*
            Weiss: Adam, DID YOU ROB A JEWELERS SHOP!!!
            Adam: *Scoffing* No. *Sirens grow closer* It was a Convention Center Show!
            Weiss: ADAM!

@farmerabe truly an end of an era

@cheezebram24 Yep.

@farmerabe fr? 

@farmerabe Runy and yang

@ farmerabe  Ruby. Not sure why, but the Moment I read that question Ruby instantly flashed into my brain... But I also think she would more pester and annoy him until he agrees to come. Pyrrha is probably the one where I actually don't have a clue as to how she would convince him. I don't even know how she would interact with him. Yang is probably the one who will genuinely convince him to join... And I just noticed that I misread the question..... Welp. Ruby and Yang. Definitely the two of them. I somehow read it as "Who would be more likely to convince Adam to visit them for holidays". Definitely a sign that I should go to sleep 

@farmerabe that and deleting old stories that weren’t updated is the biggest piece of bullshit I’ve seen them do in a hot minute

And it's done.

@farmerabe I agree it's fucking stupid