Respite

Chapter 7

The drinks and food warmed my stomach, and I sat on one of the logs the boys had dragged up to the fire. There was no anxiety or fear, it was as if I had known these people my entire life. Maggie wrapped an arm around my shoulder and laughed loudly at something Carter had said. The entire group had been nothing but laughter and stories since we got back from the waterfall and food and beer were spread between us. A part of me smiled around at them and belonging settled into my being, but another part of me felt robbed that I wasn't going to be able to live like this forever. Eventually, I would have to keep moving on.

I looked around the fire for Gray and found him standing up slightly behind the logs around the fire leaning casually against a tree. He looked at me and smiled before nodding for me to follow him. I nodded and bumped Maggie off me who looked around, saw Gray, and smiled wildly, "Have fun. Tell me everything later." She smiled wickedly before moving over towards Tori and continuing in their laughter.

I got up and moved towards Gray like I was a moth and he was my own personal flame. He reached out and held out a hand for me to grab. His warm calloused hand enveloped my own dainty hand, and I admired how the warmth of him settled into my bones from just a touch. We walked further away from the fire and into the dark woods until I was almost unable to see what was underfoot. Gray seemed to know the path well and never missed a beat as he expertly led us around tree knobs and rocks. We walked for a little while until the trees abruptly ended and we were left standing on a rock and a steep drop off. I glanced over the edge while Gray held my hand tightly to keep me from falling, "Wow." I admired. It must have been at least 200 or 300 feet drop off.

"Crazy, right?" He mused and visibly relaxed when I took a step away from the edge. He settled down on the ground, bringing me with him and settling me between his legs. I could feel his heart beating erratically and his breathing tighten as I leaned into him. I should have brought a sweater. Gray's warmth was keeping the bite from the wind off me, but I was still chilly even with the trees blocking most of the wind. As if he knew how I was feeling, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me further into him.

"Thanks for bringing me." I whispered too afraid to talk any louder or the woods would stop being as calm as they were right now. The night bugs chirped loudly, and the wind could be heard whipping past the edge of the cliff voraciously.

"I know we don't know each other long, but I really like you." Gray mumbled in my ear, "I'm glad you're comfortable with me." He ran his fingers over my arm and a shiver ran through my body.

"I feel like I've known you for a long time." I whispered. He smiled against my neck.

"Are you okay with me touching you?" his voice had turned dangerous in that moment, and I felt bold by his words. I moved so that I was turned around with my legs laid over his own and wrapped around his back and my arms wrapped around his shoulders. His blue eyes met my own and I saw the dangerous hint in them.

"You're very forward." I whispered back. He smirked at me as his hand moved from my back, up my shoulder, and was placed tenderly along my jawline to cup my cheek. He made a quick glance at my lips before meeting my eyes again as if asking for permission, and that's all it took for me to lean forward. His lips were warm and soft against my own and for a few seconds the kiss was slow and hesitant before I pressed myself further into him. Passion ignited between us, and he kissed me harshly, licking my lips with his own, and nibbling on my bottom lip until I opened my lips for him to explore my mouth. The cold wind no longer bothered me, and I kissed him back just as harshly. I felt ignited further as one of his hands dug into my hip and the other found its way from its position on my jaw to the back of my neck, gripping my hair just slightly. I had never been kissed so romantically before and I could feel mine and his desire for each other grow physically.

Eventually I pulled away so I could take in air, but he continued to kiss up and down my neck. The hand on my hip pushed my shirt up higher so he could feel more of my stomach. I wanted him to consume me in that moment. All I could feel, smell, and breathe was him and I was eager to drown in the essence of him. I gripped his jaw with one of my hands and pulled him up so that we were eye to eye. The look of passion in his eyes was enough to warm my core even further, but I settled on giving him a peck on the lips.

"I want to go slow." I whispered nervous that he'd keep going with me. I wanted to be with him and satiate my need for him, but I also was nervous about starting anything with him.

"Absolutely darling." He whispered huskily. The look of desire was still in his eyes, and he kissed me gently before resting his forehead with mine, "I'm happy to go as slow as you want." It was a promise in those words, and I marveled at it. It was stupid, but I had expected him to continue trying or to get angry with me that I started the kiss and I couldn't finish what I started. Instead, this overly large man released my hip and hair and leaned back on his palms and looked at me with so much admiration in his eyes that I felt genuinely safe and comforted in his heated gazed. I smiled widely and leaned forward to lay on his chest and gave his right pectoral a quick kiss.

"I wasn't expecting to kiss you so quickly." I couldn't help the happy laugh that filtered in my voice.

"So you were expecting to kiss me at some point?" He mused playfully and kissed the top of my head, "I know you've been staring at me all googly eyed, but man you were just waiting to get me alone weren't you?" I sat up quickly and looked at him before smacking his chest playfully.

"Oh stop!" My cheeks were a bright red color.

"I meant it when I said that I liked you, I want us to go the speed that you're comfortable with but I want to be with you." His voice was thick and husky as he kept his decibel low enough so as not to disturb the nature around us.

"I really like you too." My cheeks were instantly hot and I buried my face in his chest at my admittance.

"I'm really glad you came out with me this weekend. Everyone likes you, I think Maggie is going to try and get you to come out to their girls night every week." I peeked up to look at him and caught a glance at his encouraging smile before hiding his chest again.

"I'm glad I found this small town. I feel like I can finally live again." I admitted without thinking about the implications of my words and I could feel the tension switch from desire to confusion. He sat up straighter and wrapped his arms around me.

"You're not from Texas, are you?" His arms tightened on me, and I felt the claustrophobia and fear settle on me. Nausea swirled inside of me and my nerves went ice cold throughout my body. I tried to push him off of him, but he kept me seated on his lap, "Just answer me that and I'll let go of everything, I promise." His finger hooked onto my jaw and moved my head so that we were eye to eye. The second our eyes connected the weight of my lies flew off my shoulders if only for a few seconds.

"No, I'm not." I whispered embarrassed. He gave me a quick peck on my lips and let go of my jaw so I could resume burying my face in his chest.

"Tell me when you're ready. I just want to know you and be in your life, that's all I'll ever want from you. We can go as slow as you want. Please don't ice me out after this." He tightened his hold on me in a choking hug. It would be so easy to ice him out and to avoid him after this. I could find a new job, a new town, a new life, but I was selfish. This was the first time in years that I had found something I truly wanted to stay for.

"Okay, I'm sorry." I whispered. I was still left wondering how we went from the most toe clenching kiss of my life to this deep conversation.

"Don't, you had your reasons and I'll prove to you that I'm trustworthy for you to tell me everything." He was quick to respond. He unwrapped himself from me and then picked me up to stand me on my own legs before standing up to his full height beside me. He grabbed my hip and pulled me to him before capturing my lips again. It was a short kiss and then it felt like he got hit by lighting, "Sorry, this is not letting you pick the speed." He laughed, "I've wanted to do this for a while." He shrugged. I giggled and stepped up to him before capturing our lips together again. This kiss was less passionate, but still a sweet and gentle reminder of something new between us. Eventually we began our walk back to camp hand in hand.