March 30 2016

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I lost my virginity today.

My ideal thought on losing it would be me telling him I love him, and then him telling me he loves me, but it didn't go like that.

He kept asking me if I was sure I wanted to do this. I told him I was sure.

I'm scared that he is going to leave. He promised me that he wouldn't. I believe him, but I'm still scared. At this point, I have given him absolutely everything. I'm afraid of losing everything. I'm so afraid of him leaving me. But he promised he wouldn't. And he told me he loves me every time. I didn't necessarily want him to fuck me, I just want him to date me. I hope he knows I love him every time.

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