Maybe, sort of, kind of, possibly

So we've got something in common then?

"I'm Jess Miller, and blondes definitely don't have more fun than me! I'm 26, from London and work in IT. All of that stuff is really boring though, so here's all you need to know about me," she smiled as she looked directly into the camera, "I'm here to have fun. Screw. Love."

Ugh, I really couldn't come up with anything better than that? She was two minutes into this nightmare and already she hated herself.

Jess looked around the camera and the producer gave her a thumbs up. Thank fuck. One of the crew came over to tell her she had a few minutes before she was going to make her entrance and meet all the girls.

Yaaaayyyy... not.

Jess always got on better with boys. It wasn't that she didn't like hanging out with girls, just that boys had sooo much less fucking drama. And let's be honest, they had dicks too, and Jess loved a good ol' fuck buddy. It was the reason she was even here on this stupid game show dedicated to "looking for love". She scoffed at the thought that you could find love here. She'd calculated the success rate of the past seasons. Fucking low.

But her sister (and best friend) Sophie, had just got engaged and cooed at her one day that she should stop messing around and settle down too. She'd told Jess that she just wanted her to be happy. "I am happy," she'd always say, and she meant it too. It was a conversation they'd had many times before.

Jess had only had one serious relationship, and that ended four years ago. Badly. Since then she hasn't met anyone she felt strongly about and preferred friends-with-benefits type situations - getting rid of them when they started talking about the feels. Look, she believed in love, but she also believed in all the walls she'd put up to protect her own heart. Once was enough, thanks.

On this occasion, Sophie just happened to be having this conversation at the local pub, while they hung out with a few of their mutual friends. One of them had suggested that Jess go on Love Island, and she'd laughed so loud they caught the attention of the table next to them. Long story short, they agreed to a bet. Jess was very competitive and loved to win, especially when the stakes were high. If she lost, she'd agree to the stupid show, if she won, her sister would not have this conversation with her again. She was in. Figuring that even if she lost, they'd never accept her application.

Yeah, she lost. And then she got a call back.

She made a pact with herself before she came on. Never get serious with anyone. She knew they were all probably looking for love. She wasn't. It would end up in heartbreak with the added bonus of the entire country hating her. Probably why the producers loved her, she had rambled on in her interview about not wanting to find love and they ate it up. Heartbreak was good for ratings, but she was determined not to give it to them. Easier to just stay away. And specifically, she had to stay away from anyone who might get under her skin.

She looked in the mirror, checking everything was in the right place. Her long brown, naturally wavy hair hung just past her shoulders, looking great, as always. Her piercing blue eyes were accented with mascara and a touch of eyeliner, and she'd put some tinted moisturiser on too for good measure. She may have to wear nice clothes, thanks to the new outfits Sophie had picked out for her, but she didn't have to put on tons of make-up and she certainly wasn't going to start today. What, just because there were a million people watching on the telly? Pfft.

She wore a bright green bikini, whose top left little to the imagination of her C cup breasts and bottoms that were way too tiny to be legal - the thin straps were pulled high up on her waist and wrapped in the front, low on her stomach. Sophie had made sure to choose the right outfit to show off allll of Jess's hourglass figure.