COLOR ME, AGAIN

2

ROSÉ'S P.O.V.

Umaga na pero hindi ko pa rin maisantabi ang post ni Charles kagabi. Hindi ko rin mawari kung masaya ba ako o malungkot, ni wala akong nararamdaman kundi ang kaba. Paano ko nga ba siya haharapin kung sakaling magkita ulit kami? Ano nga ba ang sasabibin ko kung sakaling mag-uusap kami?

"Britney, maligo ka na. Ano pang tinutunganga mo diyan?"

Napatingin ako sa pinto nang biglang iluwa nito ang kuya ko.

"Just when did you forget how to read alphabet?" taray kong tanong.

Napakunot naman ang noo niya. He twists his head a bit with a curious-look on his face.

I rolled my eyes. "Did you lose your vision too? I placed a note on my door."

Tinignan naman niya kaagad 'yon. Napangiti naman siya at kumatok.

"Yes? What do you need?" I asked.

"Kailan ka ba maliligo?" he asked.

I shrugged and went off the bed. Umalis naman na siya nang dumiretso ako sa banyo.

My parents live in States. Nandoon kasi ang trabaho nila, they asked me if I'd like to go there and become an official citizen, but out of boredom, I refused. My brother didn't agree about leaving Philippines either. Thus, none of us transferred.

After I took a bath, nagbihis na agad ako ng aming school uniform at tsaka bumaba. I first went to the kitchen when I smelled my brother's adobo.

"Gabing-gabi kang umuwi kahapon. Lasing ka pa," wika niya.

I heaved a deep sigh before speaking, "Kuya, why don't you understand na lang. Alam mo naman ang rason."

"Hmm. Would you rather stay in that past break up?"

Napatingin ako sa kaniya. He's driving me to that part again. I know he has point, but just for my own sake, I wish he'll never ask about it.

"I tried to get myself out of it. But I can't. And kuya, I don't want to have a drama this morning." Isinubo ko agad ang isang piraso ng karne bago umalis ng bahay.

College student na rin si kuya. Law student siya, at ang tumatayong nanay at tatay ko. But never kaming nagalit sa aming mga magulang, we both understand the situation. Kung hindi sila magtr-trabaho, wala akong magagarang damit at makakain. I can't blame them, unang-una, hindi sila nagkulang.

"Kuya, para!"

Tumigil sa harap ko ang isang taxi. I told the driver to send me to Pacific University.

I've seen a lot of students walking beside the road with their uniforms and friends. Naiinggit ako kasi they have the smile I've longed.

But do you know what irks me the most? 'Yung umagang-umaga makakasalubong ka ng magjowa. It's not that I feel jealousy, sadyang napakajeje lang tignan. They deserve to be berated. Hindi 'yon kaaya-aya sa mga bitter na katulad ko 'no.

Pagdating ko sa main gate, some of my 'fans kuno' lined up like crazy. Hindi ko naman hinihiling 'to. I just want to live a normal life as a college student, hindi 'yung ganitong maraming distraction. Most of them are guys.