Astrikx

Chapter 15

Iris' P.O.V

For two whole days I've been contemplating about what I did back at The Legion Tower. It's like I can't escape my mistakes, my worst nightmare. The whole New York City is flooded with posters, and shrines to honour those who lost their lives.

The news is loving Astrikx, no one else is. Doc was impressed, to say the least, he even sent me thousands of dollars to spend on "anything I wanted", I have no idea what I'm gonna do with that amount of money.

On top of me drowning in my own self hatred, Devyn was seemingly avoiding me. I didn't see him once at school, and whenever I did spot him, he'd just walk away ignoring me. He's been ignoring my calls, and my texts.

I have no idea what I did to deserve that from him, and there's no way he knows that I'm Astrikx. Maybe he lost someone at The Legion Tower slaughter? I can't possibly know, unless he fucking talks to me.

Anyways, after I portaled away from Achilles, I landed in my dark bedroom. I sat on the floor staring into absolute darkness, not being able to comprehend anything. I wanted to cry, I wanted to spill some tears more than anything, but I just couldn't. And as usual I ignored the lingering guilty feeling and the urge to burst out crying, and carried on with my life.

I've also been eating my lunch in a bathroom stall. I don't wanna see my friends' faces. Theo will instantly understand something's wrong and I can't bare to talk to him.

And that's where I am right now, in a bathroom stall, with a soggy ass sandwich, avoiding everything and everyone.

"Hey, ladies." I hear a boy's voice enter the women's bathroom.

I hear scuffling noises as the girls outside the stalls get out of the bathroom. I hear the male's footsteps echo throughout the empty bathroom.

"You can't hide forever, love."

"I can try." I reply.

He knocks twice on my stall door. I reach out to the doorknob and twist it to unlock it, as he pulls the door open.

I sigh looking at my supposed best friend's disappointed face. Theo folds his arm, one over another, and leans gently against the door frame.

I slowly take a bite of the sandwich, not knowing what else to do under his disappointed gaze, and instantly regret it. I gag lightly, as the bad meat collides with my taste buds.

"Spit it out already." Theo rolls his eyes.

I shuffle the tray off of me and slide down to the bathroom floor, open the toilet seat and spit the disgusting sandwich out of my mouth.

"There, there." He pets my head in a joking manner.

I flush the toilet and clumsily stand up. I feel his gaze follow me as I walk to the sink to wash my hands.

"What do you want?" I stare at his reflection, through the dirty mirror.

"Really?"

I shrug.

"I haven't heard from you, not a single word? After spending almost everyday together, and I can tell you're avoiding me. And Devyn's avoiding my questions. So god forbid someone fucking tells me why my best friends are acting like this. I don't care if you guys are fighting or whatever, you can't just push me away." Theo bursts out, clearly not understanding why I'm acting the way I am.

"I'm s-sorry." My voice cracks.

He carefully scans my features, I bet he already knows I'm so close to breaking down.

"It's okay." Theo, wraps his warm arms around me.

"No it's not. It's not!" I slowly hit his abdomen, acknowledging my frustration.

I cry into Theo's chest as he massages my hair, every shaky breath I take, he squeezes me, letting me know he's right here.

Everything I've been holding inside, since that day, comes out. My mind flashes with images of people running and crying, images of pools of blood, images of fear and anxiety.

My body gives out as I let Theo handle my weight, he sits down against a wall, still holding my head against his chest, stroking my hair slowly.

"It's okay, it's okay. You're okay." He whispers in my ear.

"N-no, no, no. Leave me, I-I don't- I don't-" I cry, not being able to say anything else.

"I'm right here, hey, I'm right here, okay? And I'm gonna stay here, with you, no matter what. Okay? Do you understand that?" He says, in a defensive manner letting me know he's not leaving anytime soon.

I pull away and look Theo in his eyes, his kind and usually joyful eyes are now filled with pain and worry.

"T-thank you." I gulp down the lump in my throat.

"Bitch, I'd die before I leave you alone to be all sad and shit." He laughs lightly, making me laugh through my pain.

"I don't deserve you." I wrap my arms around his torso.

"No, you don't." He laughs, wrapping his arms around my shoulders.

Last few tears escape my eyes, before I pull away again. Theo takes his huge hands, and place them on either of my cheeks, and slowly wipes away the tears with his thumbs.

I close my eyes, feeling absolute comfort with him, as he pulls me closer and kisses the top of my head, like a big brother.

I place myself beside Theo, with his hands draped over my shoulders, and I rest my head on his shoulder.

"You wanna talk about it?" He asks.

I close my eyes, taking a deep breath.

"So basically, I did something extremely stupid and bad, the worst kind of bad, just because my father asked me to do it. In my defense, I had no other choice, he'd do something even worse if I didn't do what he asked me to do. And I've been feeling extremely guilty after the whole thing, and of course I wanted to forget about it, but Devyn started to avoid me, I don't know why. And you and Devyn have been friends for way longer than you and me, so I didn't want to put you in an uncomfortable situation, by asking for attention from you." I explain without taking a break.

Theo simply nods, taking everything in.

"Devyn's going through something, he'll be around soon enough, don't worry." He says, he knows something that I don't.

"And it doesn't matter that I've known you only for a few weeks and maybe a month, I don't know, clearly we've clicked. And I need you to know, that you're my bestfriend, and I'm yours and I'll be there for you no matter what." Theo smiles.

"Noted." I smile back.

We sit on the empty girls' bathroom floor of the New Hope School, in eachother's arms quietly talking and laughing, before settling into a comfortable silence.

"Iris?" I perk up from my sleepy state.

"Yes?"

"I love you." He says.

"I love you, too." I say back.

The love we have for eachother is extremely pure and of friendship. The "I love yous" are totally platonic, and we both know it. I know he doesn't feel any romantic shit for me, because I can hear his pulse, it's calm and collected.

I love this doofus, and will continue to love him for the rest of my life, doesn't matter if I'm with him 24/7 or not. I can't imagine that some people live their whole lives without finding atleast one friendship like ours. I can't believe I lived seventeen years of my life without a single friend and now suddenly I have the best the world has to offer.

As Theo held me close, and heard my rants, and saw me ugly cry, I knew more than anything that I can never live without him. I needed him to function properly, I needed him as a support system. As my backbone.