The Brightest Star in a Constellation

28: Cortisol

☽ Peter ☽

After she stands, Nicole shuffles past me. "Let's go somewhere. I'm bored."

Jay scoffs. "Infallible plan. Because it's totally not freezing or anything."

Taking the initiative, Nicole leads the group down the stairway and out the door. She bounds forward like a speeding bullet—dashing across the parking lot and heading for the middle of the road without looking behind her. Her hair cascades behind a sweater that billows out in the wind.

The group follows close behind her; Jay is typing away on his phone, and Lexa keeps trying to peek at it. A few steps in front of me are Evan and Dina.

"Where are we going?" Evan calls out.

Nicole cackles like she's plotting her next attack, and when she gets in that mood, nobody can argue with her. "You'll see!"

I speed up to fall into step with Evan as my hands sink into my pockets. The road diverts to a gravel pathway that tilts downhill. "She's going to kill us," he mutters.

Craning their head to look at Jay's phone, Lexa asks, "Seriously, though, who are you texting?"

"Evan's girlfriend," Nicole chips in.

She dodges out of my way before I have the chance to kick her. And though Evan laughs, he tells her to drop it a bit too sharply.

"As if she'd text you back," Lexa says to Jay. "We can test it. I guarantee you Claire would come back to Evan before that." They turn expectantly to him, watching him; at which point, it occurs to me that I haven't seen him use his phone. I've been texting my parents nonstop, promising them I would remember to take my medication before bed. Plus, he hasn't talked in the group chat since our quibble. "Don't you have your phone?"

"I—" Evan's mouth opens, but he instantly clamps it shut. He shakes it off like it was a reflex, then corrects himself by saying, "I don't have it. It's complicated, but I got it taken away."

"As a punishment?" I ask.

Evan nods. The path opens up to a small clearing that holds a playground that has been here for as long as I can recall. Protected by a chain-link fence, on a stretch of sprawling wet grass enclosed by trees, it creates a wind tunnel. Leaves whip around in miniature hurricanes, carrying the scent of pine and dew. Nicole races off through the fence gate to get to the slide while the rest of us stand in front of it.

Lexa says, "So, you're not planning to grovel to Claire?"

"It's far too late for that." Evan scrapes his shoe against the rocks, sending them scattering away from him. The pebbles bounce down the hillside, clattering like he's skipping stones on a lake. "It's done and buried, like six feet under level bad."

Lexa grimaces, so Evan continues, "It was essentially a routine. Cee—Claire—liked something about being the first person I'd ever dated, and the same for her. I don't really get it."

"She's a hopeless romantic," Dina says.

He shrugs. "Maybe." He drifts over to the swings, hopping on next to Nicole. She kicks off the ground, getting her body tangled in the linked chain. Evan stays in place as if sitting in a chair, pulling his feet in a semicircle through the gravel, and leaving a chalk-like residue behind on his shoes. The sound grates on me; it's like the way stepping on wooden planks irks me for fear of getting a splinter. Eventually, he pauses. "What does it matter that it was our first kiss?"