This Alien Soul

Chapter 40

Amber

"Are you sure you don't want me or Kelly to go with you?" Lindsey asked for the millionth time as I dressed in a conservative pair of pants and turtleneck sweater.

"I'll be fine. You don't want to waste your whole day in the doctors office while I get poked and prodded on." I pulled my hair up into a bun and turned to the mirror to inspect my handwork.

I hadn't had a treatment in over three weeks, I should be looking more like myself. Instead I still looked half dead. My skin chalky, refusing to hold a tan, even with my time spent mostly outdoors. The bags under my eyes refused to be hidden despite a pile of makeup. And I was still loosing weight, most days only being able to stomach one meal at most.

This was all Aleks fault.

I tossed my brush down after determining there wasn't much more I could do to improve my appearance. It was just going to have to be what it would be.

"I don't mind." Kelly assured me from her position sprawled across my bed. "I totally owe you for the way I broke the news about Emma and Brad."

I cringed just thinking about it.

For a little while I had been mad at Kelly. That wasn't something that should have been announced when it was clear the whole classroom was listening in. Though I had to admit, it had won me some sympathy points, making me seem like slightly less of a bitch for cheating on Brad. Not that it had been cheating.

But I couldn't really blame Kelly. She really had assumed that I knew about it and just didn't care. Seeing as I had been the only person apparently in our friend group who hadn't known.

"But I swear I told you before and you just shrugged it off." Kelly said adamantly.

"You probably did." I just probably hadn't listened, likely not feeling well from a treatment. "And no, it's Thanksgiving break, you don't need to be spending it in a doctors office."

"Fine, but you have to promise to tell us everything as soon as you get out." Lindsey passed me my purse from the desk she was sitting at as I walked past to leave.

"Promise."

The drive to the hospital in the next town over seemed to go on and on. With what was only thirty minutes feeling like hours. Leaving me with plenty of time to worry and stress about what the doctor would say.

My whole life I had never been to see a doctor outside of my father. I had come to depend solely on him for any health care needs. It never even occurred to me to get another doctors opinion. Why look for help elsewhere when I had the best money could buy, plus someone who loved me and would always choose what was best?

Now I found myself second guessing everything.

Why had he been steadily increasing my doses, with no true explanation? Why had he told my mother I was better off dead?

Those last words in his chilling tone still haunted me. How could my own father say that?

When I finally pulled into a parking spot at the crowded hospital I was shaking like a leaf.

What if it was so much worse than my father had been saying? What if that was the reason he had been freaking out? What if they say they can't help me?

I had to pause to compose myself before the large glass sliding doors that lead into the main waiting area for the cancer center portion of the hospital. As I watched an older lady was wheeled out, she was wheezing as she held an oxygen mask to her shriveled face. But when she pulled the mask away she still managed a weak smile for the male nurse who was pushing her to the car where her husband waited for her.