SO I WILL NOT ASK YOU
WHY YOU WERE CREEPING
IN SOME SAD WAY, I ALREADY KNOW
Growing up, I read so many books that I no longer felt as if the world I lived in was real; nobody I had ever met felt as real as those I read about in my books. That was un...
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Micheal didn't get excited about most things; but a warm shower was definitely at the top of his list. He was so excited that he wasn't even that mad he had to share a room with Carl, he was ecstatic even. If it wasn't for Carl, he wouldn't be enjoying this shower.
Micheal hated being dirty, when as a child he couldn't stand the feeling.
Each morning at the camp Micheal spent hours trying to make himself feel clean; picking the dirt out from under his nails, washing his face in the lake water, washing his hair with dish soap, he even went as far as to make sure his mom was the only one that washed his clothes to make sure they were really clean.
But now, he could finally, really, be clean.
The bathroom was full of steam from the shower, engulfing the boy in its warmth way before he had the chance to get in. Just a few seconds under the hot water made Micheal feel ten times cleaner than weeks of washing up in the lake ever could.
His laughter echoed through the shower as he lathered up his hair with more and more shampoo. His fingers vigorously worked their way through his hair, scratching away the dirt and grease from his scalp. Once he was done, he used the entire bottle of body wash to lather up his body; using his nails to scratch away the dirt from his skin.
He turned off the facet once he was done washing up and stepped out - a wave of fatigue finally hit him. He didn't know if it was from weeks of sleeping on the ground, or his exciting day, or maybe it was from the drugs and alcohol wearing off. Either way, Micheal was the most tired he's ever been.
He dried himself off and put on the pile of clean clothes Carl had set out for him: A pair of sweatpants and a science dog t-shirt that was a little too big for him. He stared at himself in the mirror and frowned; his face was still busted and bruised. His hair was stringy and began curling at the the edges it's been so long he sat with grease and dirt in his hair that he forgot he even had curls.
He turned and opened the door, stepping into the office the boys were using as a bedroom. Carl sat on the pull-out, reading a comic book that Micheal has seen him read about a hundred times now.
Carl quickly lifted his head, smiling: "finally, thought you'd never be done".
"Best shower ever", Micheal said slowly, dragging himself to the edge of the bed and plopped down face first. "I could fall asleep right here".
"Yeah, right", Carl scoffed, "I'm not sleeping with you".
Micheal lifted his head, glaring at the older boy. "I am not sleeping on the floor", he snapped, "why invite me in here if you were just gonna be a dick?".
"When I said sleep in my room, I did not mean with me", he rolled his eyes.
"Whatever, fuck you", Micheal pushed himself up and walked towards the door, but stopped as Carl called out to him.
"Fine!", Carl huffed and sunk back into the covers. He looked at the wall, clearly trying to avoid eye contact as Micheal stared hard at him. He thought for a moment, trying to decide on if he should leave or not, eventually he succumbed to the feeling of exhaustion and slowly made his way back over to sit on the edge of the pull-out. He looked down at the blanket resting half-way on Carl's legs. It was small and thin, it probably wouldn't even be able to fit over them both. He looked up at Carl, who stared at it as well, probably thinking the same thing.
He looked up at him and they made eye contact, then immediately looked away at different walls.
After a few seconds, Micheal moved to lay besides him. He didn't realize how tired he was until his head hit the pillow for the second time. His eyes fell closed and he couldn't help the shadow of a smile that tugged its way back onto his lips, he was comfortable. No forest ground, no dirty sleeping bag, he was in a clean, soft bed.
His grin fell as he felt a pair of eyes on him, it burned him.
He opened his eyes, "what?".
"Why don't you like me?".
"You were literally just about to make me sleep on the floor", Micheal scoffed.
"No, I mean...", Carl clenched his jaw, lowering his voice into a whisper, "I wasn't actually gonna make you sleep on the floor".
"Carl, you've been a jerk to me from the moment I met you", Mike scoffed, his eyes falling closed. "You said I looked like Kermit the Frog".
"... you heard that?".
"Yeah, I heard that!", Mike lifted his hand, using it to speak. "It's not even just that, you're just a dick-- even when you don't try to be".
"I said sorry", Carl whispered.
"Oh, that makes it better?", Micheal scoffed, finally opening his eyes to glare at the older boy. "I don't care, I know you only apologized because Sophia wants us to get along, but we can't. We have nothing in common, we literally just can't get along. I'll tell her you apologized and we'll be nice in front of her, but we're not friend, we never will be".
Carl stared, his eyes looked empty before shaking his head and laying down, his back facing him. Micheal stared at Carl for a few seconds before shutting off the lamp and laying down; his eyes closing.
He opened his mouth to apologize, but stopped himself. The bed shifted and a blanket was placed over him, he could feel Carl's heat.
Guilt was green.
______
Micheal woke up to the sound of Carl's voice.
"Come on, it's time to get up".
He tried tuning it out, but after a few more moments of Carl's pestering, he'd completely given up hope and twisted around to lay on his back, a pounding pain in his head. What's happening? Micheal thought to himself, nearly whimpering. Even the thoughts in his head were too loud for him.
"Are you listening?".
Micheal peeled his eyes open, coming face to face with the older boy, "what?".
"Come on, I made you a plate". Carl pulled the blanket off of him and wrapped it around himself, staring down at the younger boy as he forced himself to his feet. He placed the blanket around Micheal's shoulders and they left the room. "Everyone's mostly up".
