Just Us Tonight.

Chapter 3

I walked around the hospital for twenty-five minutes before I got bored and went back inside and sat in the cafeteria again. The day had started out great but then it changed when my mother started complaining about her chest being sore and she brushed it off the first time and I didn't mind but after the third time I knew that I needed to take to the hospital. I couldn't believe that she was gone and never coming back, I wanted to cry but I couldn't, I wanted to let it all out but nothing came out and I wanted to scream but I felt numb. My emotions were all over the place but I couldn't figure out which ones were which, this was supposed to be the chance to bond with my mother after she was sent to the asylum by my deceased father for reasons I didn't know. I wanted God to take me right there and let me be with my mother, I have never felt so alone. My mother and I weren't close but after she agreed to give our relationship a go, I knew that I wanted her to be a part of my life until I grew old too, a childish dream, yes but it is what pushed me the most and now, she was gone.

"I'm done now, let's go," Ava said and I thanked God that she came when she did.

"Alright," the word came out forced but I couldn't bring myself to care. We walked in silence to her car and I felt grateful that she didn't push a conversation with me. The car ride presented more silence than even I could handle and I shifted a little in the passenger seat hoping that my movements would help my brain think of a way to break the silence.

"Do you mind if I played music?" Ava asked and I shook my head, she inserted a CD and few songs I didn't recognize played while she hummed along, for some reason her humming brought me peace as I swayed to the songs.

"Turn left here and stop at the third apartment," she did and I took a deep breath before I stepped out. My car was still in the driveway and I stared at it thinking how it would have been if my mother and I sang along to the radio songs but it's not going to happen now.

"Why didn't you use your car to drive to the hospital, it is a thirty minute drive."

"We took a walk, we were planning to spend the whole day with each other and nature of course but then nature decided that it wanted her all to itself."

"I'm sorry for your loss," I nodded and I led us into the apartment. Even though my mother had never slept there, it felt emptier than it had every other night when I got there. We entered my room and I packed everything I owned, saying goodbye to the room when I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to my mother. It took us three hours to pack everything I owned and we walked out. I found myself wondering how it would have felt if my mother was the one helping me clean up my apartment, if she was the one asking me of we were done and if she was the who complained about how little stuff I owned instead of it being Ava.

"We are done, uhm... Let's go," I said and I walked out carrying three boxes whild Ava pulled the two suitcases that had all my clothes.

"You own very little stuff," Ava said when we exited the apartment.

"That is the ninth time you said that."

"I know and I don't think I am done," she said and I giggled. She walked to her car with my suitcases and put them in her boot and I walked to mine and put the boxes in the passenger seat before she drove off to her place while I followed.