Caroline Allen.
Smart.
Kind.
Beautiful.
Her beauty inevitably attracted the eyes of males.
Males like Ellis grove and Jordan Felix.
Read as Caroline is forced to choose between two
Loving.
Unique.
And sexy males.
But also undeniably toxic.
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The dark sky shooting massive droplets of water down to earth seems to perfectly portray how I feel inside.
For the majority of my life I've felt like a walking fuck up. Everything I touched would break into pieces almost instantly. Anyone I talked to would walk away and completely ignore my presence. So over time I learned to embrace it. I taught myself to not feel hurt nor happiness since it won't last forever. Everything is bound to end, therefore what's the point in trying?
Whether you're wealthy and thriving or sick and poor, in the end we all have the same fate. That's the motto that played in my head nonstop for years.
But lately I've found the motto to be quiet. Almost completely faint. It's so quiet that I rarely here it anymore, only when I'm around cara does it completely disappear.
That woman does something to me and I can't figure out what.
She doesn't fancy me for I don't shower her with compliments or buy her flowers but still the image of her smiling in my room that one morning is always in the back of my mind. The thought of her feeling pain, that isn't inflicted by me makes a strong emotion to erupt inside of me.
Perhaps I'm ill or simply delirious, but either way I know of one thing.
Caroline makes me happy.
-
Her soft curls are sprawled out on my chest and her delicate hands grip my shirt tightly.
Since I arrived I haven't uttered a word. I just walked in and pulled her frame into my arms.
This is so unlike me yet I can't help myself.
She was confused of course but luckily she somehow got the message that I didn't want to talk. And I am grateful got that.
She stirs against me before slowly opening her eyes to reveal a beautiful vibrant green. Even through all the horrible words I uttered towards her and the endless amount of tears she has shed because of me she still manages to hold a worried look in her expression.
"Are you okay?" She whispers out into the silent room. Her lips are slightly tilted downwards and her eyebrows are pushed together a bit. I nod, providing her with a truthful answer. Having her in my arms rather then in another man's makes me feel more then okay.
"Do you want to talk? I'm a good listener." She giggles softly.
I smile, momentarily letting my guard down.
"It's four a.m. Go back to sleep, love."
My deep baritone voice greatly contrasts hers, it's almost comical.
Her shoulders shrug while her eyes continue to stay in contact with mine. "I know your not the person you make yourself out to be. I just don't know why you continue the act."
Her words causes a chuckle to escape my lips. She seems to think she's got me all figured out. "You're wrong."
"But I'm not." She quickly replies. "I remember how sweet you were when you took me to the booke store."
"I'm an amazing actor." She shakes her head before looking away from my gaze.
We lay in silence comfortably until a thought pops into my head. "I thought you said your brother would be home."
Almost immediately, her body stiffens and breathing stops for a second. I catch all of this even while she tries to appear calm. "H-He was supposed to but had to go to work last minute."
"Hm," I taunt to worsen her frantic-ness. "Are you going to a stop lying?"
I fucking despise how she seems to believe that she can get away with shit like this. No matter how much I fancy her, I won't tolerate lying.
"I didn't lie-"
"Caroline don't." My tone is much louder and harsher then I intend it to be. I feel her body jump before staying still fearfully. I like that she is somewhat afraid of me. It allows me to feel above her and more in control, something we all know I crave.
"I'm sorry," she mumbles into my chest.
I sigh loudly, only to make her feel guilty. "You won't do it again right?"
I expect to hear her soft voice reply right away but it never comes. She is utterly silent making my anger increase. I didn't ask her a hard question so there is no reason for it to take this long for her to answer me. I give her thirty more seconds before gripping her hair in my fist. She gasps at the sudden feeling while I smile at her sounds of distress.
Tilting her head down by her hair allows me to make eye contact with her. I know she sees the fury swimming in my orbs therefore I know I'll get my desired answer soon.
"Right," she whispers. "I won't lie to you."
A huge smile is evident on my face at her words. "Good." I unclench my fists releasing her dark locs. "Now go back to sleep."
Submissively, she falls asleep minutes after.
-
Caroline and I slip into our seats.
I decided to take her out to eat. And not to some shitty mediocre diner but a good, decent restaurant. She's dressed in sweats and a sweatshirt but still just as beautiful as before. I can tell her appearance is making her uncomfortable though.
"You said we were going to McDonald's," she whisper shouts while eyeing the people around us.
"Well, I lied." She huffs annoyedly but still opens the menu.
My Mum used to bring me here all the time after soccer. God how much I adored that sport. Being able to release my anger onto the ball and yet still make my team proud was a feeling I will never forget. But as I got older, being obligated to attend practices made me feel trapped and constricted so I opted out. Now that I reflect back, maybe continuing soccer would've been better for me in the long run.
