Stuck in Between / BlindChannel

5. I still fucking love you, ok?

A/N: Ok i'm feeling generous today. So please, enjoy another part of this emotional roller coaster :)

*

I was shook by Joel's words and action. The fuck was this now? I didn't want Aleksi to see us in this situation so I pushed Joel's hands off from me.

"You need to stop that..." I said and tried to sound as normal as I could but it was hard. I literally felt his chest moving up and down against my back and some of his hair touched my head because he was taller than me. I felt trapped between him and the fridge. In any other situation I would probably have given in for him and let him do what ever he wants with me because that's what we used to be. I loved him having a control over me, but it was in the past now.

"What if I don't want to... " Joel kept whispering and I still felt his body close to mine. The way his breath danced on my neck was illegal in my current mindset.
"Joel. We have talked about this... " I said and at that moment Aleksi walked to the kitchen. Joel stepped away from me and leaned against the counter top. All I could hope was that he did not see what just happened. Not after that steamy night we just shared in his bed.

"Morning"He said to Joel and I could feel how tense Joel got. Did he know?

"Yeah.. Morning.." Joel said quietly and took the juice from my hands.

"You welcome..." I said to him and looked at him drinking from the package.

"Coffee, anyone?" Aleksi asked as he started to make one for himself. Guess he did not notice or he pretended not to.

"Yeah, thanks" I smiled to him and sat on the chair.
"I could use one too" Joel said and sat opposite of me. Aleksi nodded and made a coffee for each of us. He then sat next to me and we just had the most tense morning coffee ever. None of us didn't really say a word and it was rather weird among us because usually we'd be talking and laughing. Joel was scrolling in his phone, Aleksi looked rather thoughtful or just sleepy and I just tried to figure out that how to keep things normal between all of us.

"I think I should go... Got the cat to feed, she must be hungry and angry already.." I said after drinking the coffee. I placed my cup into the sink and looked at Aleksi, who just smiled at me and then my eyes wondered to Joel, who was still looking his phone and Aleksi in turns.

"Okay, well.. Guess we see on Monday then?" he asked knowing very well that we'd be in touch much sooner than Monday. I, for sure, needed to see him much sooner.

"Yeah, sure. Still got a a bit work to do before everything is ready" I said and tried to think out something that the situation wouldn't be so awkward.

"You wanna ride?" I asked Joel, who was still scrolling in his phone. He finished his coffee and stood up. Then he placed the cup into the sink next to me and looked me for a few second.

"Sure" he said and walked to the hallway. Me and Aleksi followed him and I took my jacket from the stand. Joel said quickly bye to Aleksi and went out. I sighed. I was hoping that all what he said and the way he acted yesterday would be just some drunk shit but now he was all sober yet still acting weird.

"Ok well... I'm not sure did he notice or why he is acting so weird.."I said and bit my lip as we both looked after him confused.

"I think he knows.. " Aleksi said and scratched the back of his head. Aleksi wasn't stupid. He also had noticed that Joel was behaving weird and usually wasn't like that when I had other guys around me.
"Was I that loud that your soundproof room didn't cover us?" I smirked and pulled him closer from his shirt. He smirked back and leaned closer to my face.