The Burden Of Love (Jonathan Toews)

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Emilia

I always adored traveling. There's no place in this world I can go where I don't feel like I belong. Because truth be told we are all more alike than we realize. Even with growing up in different cultures and places throughout the world we still eat and breathe the same. We have the same values and customs that connect us. I never feel out of place on these trip, I feel like I'm right where in meant to be.

And in the end I always know to come home. These places aren't special if you spend too much time there. So I learn what I can, absorb all that my brain will allow me then return home. Jon had his day with the cup coming up and I needed to start planning for the school year. The kids were actually excited to start school. Ken will be in kindergarten and my big girl was off to middle school. Time sure flies when you're having fun.

"What should my theme be for school this year" I wonder out loud.

"Hockey" Ken claims and I smile. Of course that's what he would choose.

"How about... animal kingdom" Jas says.

"Both of those are great. I'm sure I'll work them both in but it's 2013, I need something that prepares these kids for the future. Gets them to start asking the questions that might not be comfortable but has the answers we need" I insist.

"What about home" Jon asks and I stop. The room falls silent as we turn to him.

"What do you mean home" I wonder. Because I think I know where he's going with this but I'm not really sure.

"How home isn't where you were born or even the family you were born into. Home is wherever we decide we want it to be. Sometimes it's not even a place but the feeling you have when you're with someone. I know that I was born in Canada and I call Chicago home more times that not. But when I was in Thailand with you guys I felt right at home too.

So maybe your theme will be the kids learning to control their lives, their home. So they know that home really is where their heart is" he explains.

"I love that. Because to some home is hockey and home is wherever the animals are. To me school is home, where I belong. Where I am needed most" I admit.

"We need you too mommy" Ken reminds me and I smile.

"I know baby. You're my home too" I assure him.

We continue on with the day before I hear the buzzer go off for the apartment. So I answer it wondering if Jon's online shopping addiction got us another thing that's doesn't fit in the elevator or if the kids secretly called up a dozen pizzas again. With our little clan it can be anything.

"Hello" I answer.

"Hello Miss Emmy, are you available to come down to the lobby" the front desk man asks.

"Uh, yeah. Sure. Is everything okay" I wonder. It's unusual for them to call us down.

"There's a woman here claiming to be one of the kids' mother demanding that she take him with her. He is a minor so I couldn't give him up like that but she insisted she talked to you" he explains.

"Oh" I gasp as I cover my mouth. "I'll be right down. Thank you."

I don't tell Jon or the kids what I know as I slip out while they set up game night. It felt like the worlds longest elevator ride down to the first floor. My mind was going a mile a minute and I wasn't sure what was going to happen. Why after all this time she decided she wanted to find him? He could have been hurt or sold off or god knows what by now. What was she expecting to happen here today?

Once I get to the lobby I see Kens mom up in arms with the front desk guy. He was a kid, he didn't need to get caught up in this. So I intervene hoping to get some answers.

"Miss Davidson" I start. She turns to me with the most angry of eyes before finally leaving that poor kid alone.

"You" she accuses as she points a finger at me. Her flip flops slap against the ground as she stinks her way on over. "Stupid ass white bitch. You stole my baby from me."

"Stole" I gasp. "I saved that baby from you. Kenny is five years old and you left him by himself with nothing to survive. Grabbed all your things and took off with nothing but "don't talk to the white lady" as a parting gift. You have a lot of nerve showing up five months after you left your kid behind without food or anything to help him" I accuse.

"Kenneth is my child and I never legally gave him up. I have every right to take him back" she yells.

"You have no right! Coming in here calling me names when all I've done was love your son. Give him a roof over his head and food in his belly. You left him to die Miss Davidson, I gave him a home" I defend.

"His home is with me" she tells me.

"His home is wherever he deems it to be" I correct.

"Okay. So let him choose. Let me see him and then he will remember who his real momma is. There's nothing you can give him that will change that. Let him see for his own what we both know" she demands.

"You mean remind him that you left? Help him remember what is probably the scariest times of his life? Him walking around a mostly empty apartment calling you name and you never showing up? You think he's going to chose that over what he has here" I question.

"You mean over all this fake shit you give him? You dress him like he's one of you when he's not. Baby this ain't The Blind Side, he's just a kid. You flaunting him around in the media talking about what you've done for him but it doesn't change shit" she spits.

"Flaunt him around? We kept him away from everything because we love him. Because we didn't want people like you popping up accusing us of stupid stuff. We don't dress him like he's someone he's not. He picks out all his clothes and dresses himself. We got him a real good barber who keeps his hair neat and he chooses his path. His home. We've been able to let him do that by staying hidden. This isn't about money or fame, it's about protecting him. Making sure he is in a safe environment to grow and I know that's not with you" I assure her.

"I guess we will find out. I'll be back tomorrow and we will see who he wants. And I full heartedly plan on leaving with my baby and bringing him home" she says.

"He already is home" I say softly.