allow me to introduce myself

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Where do I begin?

Maybe with a simple hello? Or should I just go ahead and begin the story? Maybe I could explain how I got here? Or could I introduce myself?

Yeah, I’ll introduce myself.

Hi.

Any questions?

Oh, right, you can’t ask any.

That’s exactly why I’m doing this. I don’t want any questions asked. Questions, they’re all I ever hear. I’m tired of being asked things. I just want to tell you when I’m ready.

You’ll never know what I look like, which doesn’t make me sad. Another plus to this: you’ll never know who exactly I am. You’ll have my story, and that’s it. Kind of like a soft secret.

Maybe some of you will figure it out, or maybe you already know. Hopefully those of us who know will have the human decency to keep it to themselves. Hopefully those of you who figure it out won’t say anything. And for those who guess, hopefully you’ll never guess right.

Now…

Do I give you a basic tour of myself? Or do I allow you to figure out my problems one by one?

No, that’s too easy.

I’ll just start at the beginning, like the very beginning.

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