You. It has always been you. Let's go a little back in time shall we?
It was about a year plus ago when we first started texting each other. I didn't have the courage to ask you personally for your number because Oh God, I didn't even dare to look at you face to face. So what do cowards like me do? I decided to ask my friends who basically is in the same stream as you and technically, he was one of my close friends. At first, he told me that he was scared to give as you didn't give permission to him (as he didn't ask ) but then I told him that I kind of adore you for a couple of days since the first time I saw you.
You, walking towards the canteen with your group of friends and chatting and that's okay, until you smiled. Gosh, I don't even know how to describe that smile of yours. So simple and just so, perfect.
That night, I took the courage to drop you a text and apologized to you for not asking you for permission for your number. To be honest, I didn't expect for your reply because honestly at that point of time, I was alone. Emotionally and physically. Without wasting anymore time, I blanked my phone screen and put my phone beside my pillow. Suddenly, there was a vibration on my phone as I've set my phone on silent mode. I thought that it wasn't something important. I decided to check what the notification was about and Oh my, how amazed I was when I saw your name appearing on my notification board. I didn't know how to react to that and without wasting anymore time, I decided to click your text. My first thought when I opened up the text was that I was expecting you to say I'm a weirdo or who's crazy for not asking permission to have your number. All of that disappeared instantly when you started the text with "Hi ! Hey don't apologize for that. You know, you could just ask me personally you know!!! :) " Oh how friendly you were. It amaze me that someone like you would exist in my so called, 'dark world'. Day goes by and we became friends. After a few weeks, I was starting to get afraid. There are quite some reason why I was afraid. I'll list down a couple.
First, I was afraid that I'll hurt you. The reason is because of my past. Hard times occured during most of my past. I thought that I need protection and so I got myself into a gang. At that point of time, I do know that what I did was wrong. Smoking, beating people up and being rude to others was like an everyday activity. I've been so rude to others that I'm afraid I'll do the same to you. Honestly I really didn't want to lose you just because of that because at the very moment I saw you, I know that I need to change for the better. I didn't want to tell you about my past first as we just know each other and I was afraid you wouldn't accept me for my past. I know I can't decide how things are for going to go so I decided to just go with it.
