Sotus one-shots

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT OUR SEXUALITY

“Kongpob.” He paused for a few seconds before speaking.

“I think.. I… I might be gay all this time” He sat straight on his side of the bed.

I snapped my neck towards the love of my life so fast that it made a cracking sound.

“What made you think so. P’?” I asked. Surprised. 

“Weren’t you hung up on P’Namtarn for three years? Before we started dating?”

“I thought I was. Because it made sense. I mean Namtarn, Jay, and I used to be joined at the hips during our high school days. I mean, I thought…I thought Namtarn is beautiful and my heart skipped a bit when I used to see her and Jay together. And my heart used to beat faster whenever I saw Jay smile. I ignored it. You know!! I’m from a small town. It didn’t make sense. So, the easiest conclusion was thinking that I’m in love with Namtarn.” He paused for a little before continuing “When I moved here in Bangkok, I met the guys. And I frankly thought Prem and Knot were extremely good-looking. But, I’m not someone as flamboyant as Toota. I thought how can I be gay!! I mean aren’t gay guys made of sunshine, daisies, and a rainbow? So, I started obsessing over Namtarn. That was the only way to distract me from the thought. I think... I used Namtarn as a defense mechanism to cope up with my internal turmoil. Do you understand what I’m trying to say Kongpob?”

“I do. P’” I said smiling. My heart ached though. I don’t like the fact that I’m not the only guy P’Arthit has been attracted to in his life.

It’s been six months since P’Arthit and I started dating. He is still the tsundere head hazer we met six months ago who acts all tough when freshmen like us are in his vicinity. But the truth is, he’s the shyest guy I’ve ever encountered in my whole 18 years lifespan. I understand, admitting how he was always shy and kept things to himself. He has thought about it a lot it seems. Also, he has come a long way to admit this in front of me. 

I, on the other hand, always wore my heart on my sleeves. I was never confused about my feelings toward my P’Arthit. 

“Kong”

“Kong”

Suddenly, I snapped away from my rail of thoughts as P’Arthit called me.

“Hello, Earth to Kong. Can you listen??” P’Arthit tried to be funny. 

“Of Course I can listen to you P’. I mean I’m not deaf.” I deadpanned. 

“Well. I have been calling you for a while. You, on the other hand, stared at the wall for an ample amount of time” 

“Tell me Kong… Are you disgusted about the fact that I might be…. No no, I am gay?” His voice trailed off to the unknown. 

“Are you insane, my love?” I scoot towards the love of my life and take him in my arms. 

“I love you, Oon. So much that it physically hurts me when I am away from you the whole day. Why would I be disgusted?”

“But you kind of went silent after I blurted this to you. Oh my god. Did I scare you?” P’Arthit started panicking. 

“I mean I know this is not the same for you. Before me, you have never had feelings for a man.”

“True P’. I didn’t. I never gave a thought about my sexuality. I mean I was a lanky boy in an all-boys school and I was a huge nerd. M was kind of my only friend. Though I had a girlfriend when I was 16. It lasted only for a year. So, I thought I was straight. I still think I’m just gay for you” 

“What!!!” Now it was time for P’Arthit to snap his neck towards me with a shocked face. “You moron, you never told me that you had a high school girlfriend!!”