The Unusual Suspects

Dom

I really hadn't been saying too much to anyone lately, just been in my own head. Been spending time by myself and doing things on my own. Sometimes I feel like this is how it is supposed to be, or the reality of what's to come for me and my daughter. I was sitting at the island eating a bowl of oatmeal as I looked through ad papers at baby items. I was determined to go pick up some bottles and slings today. Most of the things I needed, I already had but I didn't want anyone to choose the bottles for me and as far as slings, I want what best suits me. I was finishing up when Nicole walked into the kitchen.
"Good Morning Sunshine." she said sounding unusually chipper for the morning time.
"Good Morning Nic!" I said attempting to match her energy.
"I see I didn't have to threaten you to eat today, good." she said as we both laughed a little. "How are you though?" she asked as she sat down and started drinking her coffee.
"I'm okay. Just trying to make some decisions on stuff for the baby. How about you?" I asked her.
"Trying to prepare to be a mother in a few days." she said referring to Malachi coming to stay with us.
"Yeah, it's quickly approaching. You ready?" I asked her.
"I am, you know I adore kids, it's just the adjusting to being with us part. I want him to have a good transition. But I also wanted to talk to you about what's probably gonna be inevitable." I turned to give her my complete attention at the moment. "Dom, you realize that you're his mother's identical twin?"
"Of course." I said with a slight laugh. How could I not?
"He's probably gonna attach himself to you more than anyone." she said and I had given that some thought.
"Yeah, I expect that." I said.
"I just don't want you to feel like, this is all on you because you have your own coming. We're all in this together boo." She said before she moved in and hugged me. Nicole was never like this, I expected this from Erica though. Maybe this experience is softening her. But I can't lie, I needed to hear that someone got me though. "Have you and Martin talked?" she asked me and I shook my head. I wasn't even close to ready to address that shit yet. "I get it Love, don't think I don't. But yall are better than this." she said and honestly, she was right. I just wanted my brother to be like my Dad, but he wasn't that. I knew it, but I don't know what I expected. I can't say he was wrong for what he said, but it could've been said with more tact.
"That's my brother, I'mma always love him regardless. I don't like what he said to me, but he was right. Maybe I just needed that raw and uncut. It's all good." I said as I got up to put my bowl in the sink after I rinsed it. "Dom, you don't have to be strong all the time." she said.
"What?" I said.
"Girl you can cry, it's okay. If you need to scream, do it. If you need to cuss these niggas out, do that. You cannot keep bottling this up because it's hurting you. I can see it in your eyes." she told me and honestly, I've always bottled up my emotions because I realized no one really gave a fuck about my feelings outside of my Dad. Nope, couldn't do it.
"I'm good." I told her as I shut the water off and I looked up to Justin and Martin walking in the kitchen. It was a small awkward silence in the room and then I walked out in the other direction to go into the living room to grab my bag so I could leave. I picked up my bag and grabbed my keys and walked out the front door when I heard footsteps coming towards me.
"D wait." Justin said and I just kept walking. I reached the door to my car when he jumped in front of it. I looked up at him. "Listen...I don't know what I did to you or why we're even like this right now. But you could at least just tell me what I did." I just stared at him. "Come on man, talk to me. It's been days Dom." I took a deep breath.
"Nothing." I said to him.
"What?" he said.
"You didn't do anything to me." I told him.
"So why are you shutting me out?" he asked me.
"Because I don't know what to believe when it comes to you." I told him.
"Bae, I have never lied to you though. I'm not understanding. At this point, if you don't wanna be with me, just say that."
"Here you go." I said as I side stepped him to reach for my door handle. He blocked me again. "It ain't about not wanting to be with you, it's about can I trust you?"
"What the fuck else can I do to prove to you that I'm worthy to be trusted?"
"Be real with me."
"I always am."
"Then explain this to me again. What the fuck happened the night of your fight?" I asked him and he took a deep breath at that moment and refocused his attention back to me.
"I already answered this. So maybe you need to hear it again. Dominique, that was years ago. I was angry, I was hurt, I was a completely different nigga back then. I snapped and I blacked out. As I always do when I fight so I try my hardest not to. I did not mean to do all of that to him nor her. I was wrong and I did what I had to do to make up for it. The world keep judging me for a mistake from years ago, it's like damn can I live? People make mistakes, they learn from them too. They change. I've NEVER been that guy with you, so why are you stuck there?"